Towards The Sun
by AnnaJessieDiaz
Summary: What if Ana and Christian never met? What if he got his heart broken after Elena left him for Isaac? Christian almost killed them so he was sent to prison for one year. Now, he finally comes out with no hope in life. That's until he meets broken widow Ana. . . Story of two broken people healing each other. :) Based on the Silver Linings Playbook.
1. Chapter 1: Meeting Anastasia

**Hey Guys, I am back. I ain't satisfied of my 'No White Flag' Story so I deleted it. I have just been discharged from the hospital for having peptic ulcer. I never thought that seeing my poop without blood would be one of the happiest things in my life. Because of my experience also, I realized how precious life is and how you are lucky to live. I got inspired to write this story and I am really hoping you'll like this.**

**CHAPTER 1: MEETING ANASTASIA**

**CPOV**

_. . . Abused until I was four_

_. . . Didn't talk for two years_

_. . . Became a Sub for the woman I love_

_. . . Became a dominant for six years_

_. . . Got engaged to Elena_

_. . . Left disappointed and hurting in the altar_

_. . . Found out that she left me for a man named Isaac_

_. . . Had a plot to kill them both_

_. . . Wounded them both causing me to go to jail_

_. . . Spent a year in jail_

I am Christian Grey, twenty nine years old and that's how fucked up my life is. From the day the crackwhore gave birth to me, God really made me feel unwanted and unlucky. I still remember the man who treated my chest as an ashtray to his cigarette. It fucking hurt like hell.

The Trevelyan-Greys helped me so much. Without them, I wouldn't be experiencing such wonderful things but they are not that wonderful enough for me to forget my wrath in my life. However, when I had the sexual relationship with Elena, I felt completely loved and alive. She was my everything and I'd give up every freaking thing for her. Our different kind of relationship ended when her bastard abusive husband found out. After that, we remained friends and she helped me establish my own company. . . Grey Enterprises Inc.

I was a dominant for eight years. I had twenty Subs and they were all brunettes. Each time I punish them, I feel like I am having revenge on my mother who neglected me and let me starve for how many weeks.

Me and Elena admitted to ourselves that we love each other. Age didn't matter to us. I was twenty seven and she was forty two. My mother was furious at first but over time, she accepted the fact that I am in love with the beautiful, Elena. I was ready for anything. I am excited for the wedding and for the romantic honeymoon and believe it or not, I was eager to have kids. But life . . . it just

sucks!

I was a wifeless man left in the altar. I was humiliated and my dignity was crashed. I spent weeks drinking beer and any alcoholic beverages. My parents were heartbroken and they were doing everything just for me to have a cure. Nothing worked. All I wanted was Elena! Elena, the beautiful harlot who left me for that Isaac! I spotted them walking hand in hand across the street and my eyes saw red. I hired someone to spy on them and they were getting married. I did not control myself.

I grabbed a knife and found my way to Elena's mansion. I entered and there I saw her. I stabbed her once and when I saw Isaac, I almost stabbed him but the police arrived. That Elena Judas Lincoln was lucky to be alive. I was deemed guilty and my case was Attempted Murder. They went through all my things and found CCTV footage of me with my Submissives on the playroom. My mom fainted when she found out and Dad was speechless.

I spent one whole year in jail. My family paid a lot for me not to go through more than ten years being captive. One year had passed and my heart and dignity was still crashed. Life is too hard for me to handle since the day I was born. FUCK! Why can't just God give me light? Can he just tell me what I am living for?

"Son, your brother, Elliott is waiting for you." My mother interrupted my reminiscing. I smiled at her and stood up from the sofa. When I reached her, she hugged me tight. I kissed her cheek and smiled at her. I've put her through so much and I feel bad for that. "The car is ready" She added. I went out of the door and saw the car door being opened by Taylor. I glanced at him before entering the backseat. He got inside the car and started the engine.

I waved goodbye to my Mom and sighed. Elliott invited me for a dinner in Kavanagh Restaurant. He said it is the restaurant of his fiancé's brother. I sighed at that. One bright thing is that Elliott's going to have a wedding without a runaway bride. I never really met Kate. He said she was the girl he met in a bar. I shrugged. Who would've thought Elliott would meet his future wife at a bar? He is having the time of his life and look what I've become. I am an ex-convict with a business ran by my father and there is no light in my tunnel.

"We're here, Sir." Taylor spoke and I took a deep breath. He went out of the car and opened the door. I went out and I faced him. "Thanks" My voice was barely a whisper. He nodded and I walked to the restaurant. I wore a suit and I looked formal but it doesn't hide that I am completely fucked up.

I went inside and the place was what I expected. There are many chandeliers and elite people were inside. My eyes roamed around the room and there I saw Elliott and Kate in the corner of the room. They are facing each other and they are obviously in love. I walked to them and cleared my throat.

"Hello" I greeted, folding my arms.

"Christian, Bro. . . this is Katherine Kavanagh, the love of my life." The blonde giggled at Elliott's description and I rolled my eyes. Great, a blonde! She reminds me of that female Judas. She must've noticed it because her lips went to a hard line. Nevertheless, she remained to be a woman of etiquette.

"Nice to meet you, Elliott told me _a lot_ about you." She offered her hands and I shook it. "Nice to meet you too" I sat beside Elliott and he wore the biggest smile.

"Weird smile" I stated.

"It's just nice to see the two most important persons in my life to finally meet. Tell you what, I ordered white wine for you." I smiled at him. Me and Elliott have always been close. He's the greatest brother anyone can ever have but no matter how much I love him, I don't like Katherine. Grrr... there's just something too unlikeable about her.

"So, what's the date of the wedding?" I took the initiative to start a topic.

"June is the month of fertility so we decided to have it the first of June." Elliott answered and I nodded. June was named after Juno, the goddess of fertility so yeah, I decipher. Kids are a big turn off for me now. Then, a waiter gave us our meal and Kate thanked him.

"Ethan cooked this. He's great" Kate said to me.

"Ethan, your brother?"

"Yup" She answered and I tasted the lobster. Wow! It's really amazing. I smiled at the two lovebirds and they had the expression, 'told ya so'. I kept eating the delicious meal and my attention was caught when Kate called someone. "Ana! Ana!" I looked to the left and then I saw that she was calling a brown haired girl with blue eyes who just entered the place. She wore a big brown coat with green shirt and big pants underneath. She smiled a little at Kate and Blondie stood up to come to her.

"Who's that?" I asked Elliott.

"That's Kate's widow best friend, Anastasia." I looked at Elliott as if he had four eyes.

"What? That girl was married?"

"Yes, she was. Her husband died a year ago." Whoa! I cannot even believe that that messy looking girl had a husband. I looked at the girls and they were coming to our table. Elliott said, "Look's like she's gonna eat with us so Christian don't ever bring up her husband's death." I nodded at him and Kate took a seat with Anastasia. The brown haired girl sat across me and I noticed the purple shade under her eyes. Freaking depressed woman.

"Christian Grey, this is Anastasia Rodriguez-"

"Kate! Please! I go by the name of Anastasia Steele now! So please! Stop reminding me of. . . you know who!" Kate went guilty so she just grinned. I looked at Anastasia and she took my plate and ate the lobster with her bare hands. Oh my Gosh! This is fucking disgusting.

"You have no social graces" I told her and she lifted her face to see me. I looked at Elliott and he wore that 'oh no' expression. "Did you invite this woman here?!"

"Hey Muck!" Muck?! No one ever dares to call me something as disgusting as that. "I'm right here in front of you, you know."

"And you are right in front of a food. You indeed have bad social graces because you just said 'muck' in front of a food." I fought.

"Hypocrite! You just said it in front of the food just now."

Damn! This woman has a point. . . I am now getting mad! "Well, who was the person who dragged my plate to her so that she can eat?!"

"They invited me just now and I am not coherent. When they just informed me earlier, I should've taken my medicine and I won't be losing my mind enough to pick up your plate!" Oh now, Elliott and Kate did the mistake?!

"Well, what are you doing here anyway?" I raised my voice and I saw people staring at us right now.

"I was here to talk to Ethan" She raised her voice too.

"What? You're here to talk to Ethan 'cause you want him to be a rebound because your husband died a year ago?!" Her expression turned grim and I saw her eyes watering. Oh no.

"You just crossed the line" a blonde man said meters from our table. I returned my attention back to Anastasia and said sincerely, "I am really, really sorry. I-I didn't mean it." Okay, my apology was sincere. She stared at me and tears fell down from her cheeks. She grabbed her bag and walked out. The blonde man stared at me before running after the woman I just hurt.

"Ethan's gonna hate you forever" Elliott told me.

"That was Ethan?" I asked.

"Yes" He answered then added, "He has been comforting Ana since Jose died. They have this strong bond but it's nothing more than friendship. Christian, I told you to be nice." I closed my eyes and put my hand on my face. I inhaled and slowly opened my eyes. Seriously asking, was I made to hurt women?

**Guys, is it okay? Is it interesting? Is it great? Well, it's inspired by The Silver Linings Playbook and I suggest you watch that. It's very realistic and beautiful. Jennifer Lawrence and Bradley Cooper had an amazing chemistry. ****J**** Thanks Guys!**


	2. Chapter 2: Friends?

**Hey Guys, I would like to thank you a lot for the support I am receiving. I am glad you found my story great and interesting. So, you ask why Ana behaves that way. Well, you'll find out on the next chapter. I would like to thank Isla, , Pielietje, SparkfromtheHeart, guests, , APEJEN, pookiebear3, Skgcsandra, shan36, kaycad742 & Really True Love for the reviews! **

**CHAPTER 2: FRIENDS?**

**CPOV**

"Well, she was really ill mannered! I was enjoying the lobster Ethan Kavanagh made. Now, I have to face that man knowing that he's extremely mad at me! I mean, fuck! I was just expressing the anger that I felt! What would you feel if you were enjoying your meal then somebody just gets it from you and intake it with her bare hands!" I expressed everything to Doctor Flynn. I sighed. As much as I don't want weekly therapy, I need to. This is for Carrick and Grace.

"Go on, Christian. Just let it out." Dr. Flynn's cool voice told me.

I took a deep breath then said, "I knew I was wrong for insulting her about her dead husband but can you blame me? It's just . . . it's just. . . UGH!" I literally screamed in front of my therapist. Well, he is a therapist and I am sure he can understand that. Why did I have to meet that girl who calls me 'muck'? She just added stress to my life.

I looked at Dr. Flynn to see his reaction but I see his lips lifted up a bit. What? Did I just give him joy after screaming like I am a guy from a mental hospital?

"Christian, how many days has it been since you met this widow?" He asked me in his normal relaxed voice. I like hearing that. He keeps me calm. I am also happy because Dr. Flynn stayed with me despite all the sorts of melancholy I kept on crying about.

"Well, it has been a week." I answered him and he smiled even more. Okay, what's going on? I raised my brow at him and folded my arms. "What are you smiling about, Doc?" I am really curious right now. This man never smiles during all our sessions. He's the kind of man who happens to be so serious like I am. Then, he let out a laugh and shook his head.

"Christian, you've been thinking about her." He answered me and I let myself think deeply at that. Do I think about her poor manners and disapproving appearance often? "Yes, I think of her but in a bad way." I defended myself. No way am I going to let myself have a crush on that girl.

"You know what? I would like to ask you if your BDSM lifestyle helped you just one bit. Did your life get better when you sleep with those brunettes and beat them?" My face turned grim at that question. Well, they say that the truth hurts but I am immune to all sorts of pain.

"Honestly, no it didn't. It just paved the way back to Elena which really gave me more hurt. I guess revenge is just not the best way in life. My real mother died, okay? And being a dominant to those who look like her didn't give me more happiness. Instead, it left me miserable." I let out what my heart speaks. I have learned that what I do to those girls was all wrong and it didn't help me even a bit.

"I am glad you realized that, Christian. I am glad you know that revenge is like a drug. You think you're happy if you do it but it just ruins you." I nodded at that. I couldn't agree with him more. Then he added another question, "Now, I would like to ask if you still love Elena. Sorry for being too straightforward but I have to."

I glared at the ground and it took seconds for me to answer his question. "Well, I don't now but I still can't forget her. I can't forget what she did. It feels like a tattoo. It's stuck forever. It even lets me think that all women are bitches who would trade you always." I looked at him and he is now serious-looking.

"Christian, sometimes the only way for a person to fully forget the past is to find another who he'll love more." Seriously? Did he just say that? He just told me that I should find another girl that I would love. No shit!

"Dr. Flynn, I hate to say this but women are demon's offspring. I've seen it all since the day I was born. My crackwhore of a Mom didn't even defend me to her pimp. An older woman treated me as her Submissive and leaves alone, ashamed in the altar. Women are just . . . bad, Doc." I explained to him and I can tell by the way he looks that he is super disappointed on me. I know what he thinks. I've turned into a real pessimist and non-believer.

After a few minutes, he finally replied, "I know with all my heart that what you said is never true. One day you're going to realize that not all women are like that. All you need is someone to love you. All you need is a turning page. Life is a book and all you need is someone to be with so you'll continue all the chapters. Therapy dismissed. Come back next Saturday. Thank you for your time, Christian." I stood up and shook his hand. This therapy ended so badly. He smiled at me but it was the frustrated kind of smile. Well, I am a difficult person to deal with.

I went out of his office and found Taylor about to open the door of the backseat. Once he opened it, I went inside. He too came in and the car drove fast. I stared right outside the car and the trees are all I see. Why is my life like this? Oh sure, I am rich but people who are aiming to be rich should know that money can't make you happy. My life's really miserable, fuck! After few minutes of reflecting, we finally arrived in front of my parent's house and what the fuck?!

I see that woman outside our gate wearing that brown coat again but this time, a black turtleneck sweater, shorts and boots underneath. She tied her hair up for a ponytail and to be honest, she looked better in that. "Taylor, just wait a sec" I told him and he nodded. I went outside the car and walked towards her.

"Hey Muck, how are you doing?" She greeted me as if I never offended her.

"What are you doing here, faeces?" I insulted her with synonym of muck but I know that that is a much more disgusting term.

"Faeces?! Hahahahahahahha!" She laughed out loud and I could've sworn that her stomach hurts just now. She reddened as she laughed and I smiled at that. _What? Christian, are you smiling at that god awful woman?_ I forced myself to frown but she's so cute. _Stop it!_ _Christian, she's not cute_! Then, her laughter faded and she got serious.

She cleared her throat before speaking, "No, Seriously, Mr. Christian Grey, I sincerely apologize for my behaviour last week. Ethan talked things out to me and I realized how wrong I was." I raised my brow at her and this time I cannot hide a smirk.

"So you are apologizing, huh?" I teased her. _Wait! Christian Grey is teasing?! _My pessimist side said and my optimist battled, _shut up!_ I looked at Anastasia and she was smiling and she bit her lip. She looked really cute when she did that. She looked up at me and asked, "Why are you staring at me like that?"

"What? What do I look like?" I smiled.

"You look at me as if I am the cutest thing you ever saw." She answered and it's time to put on the mask. I frowned at her then said, "Okay, I forgive you for stealing my lobster that night." I don't know why I forgave her that early and easy. This is so insane. Her lips formed a huge smile and she told me, "I am glad you accepted my apology."

"Yeah, yeah! I wanna go inside now, okay? You can go home." I looked at Taylor and he entered the car inside my parent's mansion. Ana said, "Your house is really Patrician."

I looked weirdly at her. "Patri-what?"

"Well, Patricians are the aristocrats of the Roman History and the poor ones were the Plebeans. Your house is really for elite, you know. Well, duh! You're the Trevelyan-Greys!" This woman has a really smart mouth.

"Go home, okay? Because I am heading inside." I was about to come inside the house but I heard Ana's voice saying, "Will you walk me home?" My eyes widened and I stared at her, "Are you freaking insane?!" Then, Taylor appeared behind me then asked, "Is this woman causing a problem, Sir?"

"No, I am not causing any problem. I just want someone to walk me home." She answered as if she were a child.

"Just go home on your own!" I told her.

"My house is just near here and I am so damn sure that it won't hurt your feet." I stared at her for a long time before giving in. I sighed and went to her. Taylor followed from behind and I am sure he won't even utter a single word when we walk home this woman.

"Let's go!" She said and we headed straight to the road on the right side of our house. She kept staring at Taylor who walked right behind us. I am seriously getting annoyed at her staring at him from time to time. Then, she spoke to him, "Why so serious?" Taylor raised one brow at her then said, "It's part of my job, Ma'am." Anastasia nodded. Thank God! She understood what bodyguards are!

"Christian, you know why I acted like that the other night?" She started a topic.

"How am I supposed to know?" I responded in sarcasm.

"I'll just ignore you being sarcastic, okay? Well, I wasn't able to take my maintenance. I am a really depressed woman, you know? When you're depressed, you're too dysfunctional to think. I wasn't thinking at all." She explained and I understood.

"Okay" I said.

"You are really a man of few words." She told me and my expression turned weird.

"Is your house that far?!" She giggled a bit then said, "Well, we are here." We were standing right in front of a cream colored house that obviously has two stories. "You live here alone?" I asked and she nodded.

"It's very near your parent's house." She stated and I just nodded.

"Goodbye!" I said but she stopped me again. "Wait Christian! Can we please have dinner tomorrow night?" What? I looked at Taylor and he was trying to hide a smile. I thought deeply of this thing. Pessimist says, _Don't go out with her! She might embarrass you in front of all people. _Optimist argued, _Well, it's not a gentleman's doing to reject a cute girl._ Pessimist or Optimist? Grrrrr...

"Okay, I'll pick you up at seven" She smiled big and ran inside her house. I looked at Taylor and he was smiling to himself while whistling a song. What the hell did I just do? I am going out with Anastasia and I am not sure if that is a good thing.

**So,,,, what do you think of this chapter? Should I continue?**


	3. Chapter 3: You Felt It?

**Good Morning Guys! Thanks for all the positive feedback I received. I would like to thank the negative reviews also because it made me even stronger. Thanks to kturner1187, Skgcsandra, Speakfromtheheart, Pielietje, APEJEN, kaycad742, shan36, fallunder, guest, pookiebear3, Christian618, ReallyTrueLove and 23.**

**CHAPTER 3: YOU FELT IT?**

**CPOV**

"Who are you going out with?" My mother asked me as she saw me doing my necktie. I answered her, "Anastasia Steele" I saw her nod through the reflection in the mirror and somehow she's got a sympathetic look on her face. After I finished my tie, I looked back at her. "Do you know her?"

"Oh yes, she's the widow." I already knew that but I just nodded. Mom's expression right now is like a charity doer. Her eyes really tell me that she feels bad of Anastasia's past. Then, to my shock, she added, "She was a really great woman, you know. She worked in a Publishing House and her husband was a photographer. She had a son named JJ. We were all feeling bad for her when the car accident happened. She lost three people. Jose, JJ and the unborn child she was carrying." I looked at my Mom as if she was alien. What? Why didn't Elliott tell me this?

I took a seat on the bed and Grace sat right next to me. "Can you tell me more about her?" I asked Mom and she smirked a little. "You're going to know her a lot better today because you are going on a date." I shook my head in a frustrated manner at that. "Please Mom, tell me more." She sighed a little.

"I was actually surprised to find out that you and her are going out. I had never seen her with somebody than Jose. And you . . . Well; you're not asking her to be a Submissive, right?" My eyes went huge as saucers at what my mother just said. I raised my voice, "Of course not! I quit that life!" She smiled big at what I said. There is no way in hell I am going to make a widow who lost two kids as a Submissive. I am not that heartless. I know how to care for people actually.

"Just don't break Ana's heart. It's been a long time since we saw her smiling." What? Anastasia's first time to smile was with me? Boy, I must be deluded! Then, Mom kissed my cheek. "Son, good luck on your date. You really, really look handsome." She spoke and I smiled at her. "Bye Mom. I love you" I told her sincerely. Without her, I am freaking nothing. "Love you too, Baby." She replied motherly.

I went out of the house and entered the car alongside Taylor. Mom spoke of how handsome I look but is Anastasia presentable enough? If yes, I will take her to an Elite restaurant and if no, the burger house it is. There's a bigger possibility that we will end up in a Burger House because she may wore that big brown coat with something that doesn't match underneath. I'll feel sorry for myself for wearing a suit. A very formal suit.

We parked in front of her house and I told Taylor, "Wait here". I went out of the black car and pressed the doorbell. It took me three times before she opened the door. And. Oh. My. Fucking. Gosh. She's. . . hot, sexy, beautiful, extraordinary, gorgeous. I stared at her from head to toe. Her hair was curled and she put on light make up. Her dress was beige and her heels were black cigarettes. I know my jaw just dropped right now.

"I take it from your expression that I look presentable." She teased and I cleared my throat. I cannot think of other words. "Well, you look . . . beautiful." She blushed at what I said. God! She's even cuter when she got red shades on her cheeks. I smiled and cleared my throat. I offered my arm to her and she gladly took it. I opened the car door for her and she entered the car. I followed her actions with the thought in my head, "Elite Restaurant it is"

"Hey! Mr. Serious is smiling!" She stretched her body just to see Taylor and he is really smiling. I know that smile! He is teasing us. Well, he was never that with Elena. _Christian, all women are like Elena._ I hear the pessimist side of me say. _Never compare her to your past. She's too good for that. _The optimist battled. I just wiped away Pessimist. . . for now. Later, we arrived in front of the restaurant. I went out of the car and opened the door up for Anastasia. She went out of the car and asked me, "Did Taylor eat already?"

"Yes, he did. Why are you so concerned about him, Anastasia?" My God! Am I being jealous? Because seriously, I get annoyed when she teases him.

"He just reminds me of my Dad. Christian, why don't you just call me Ana? We're friends right now who are having a date." She smiled and I raised my brows at her.

"Okay Ana, why don't we just proceed to our friendly date?" I grabbed her hand and I could not deny the jolt of electricity I was feeling.

"Christian, this is an actual date-date." I looked at her weirdly after she said that.

"Really?"

"Well, you felt it, right? Just now when our hands entwined there's a spark and you've been thinking of me a lot." Fuck? How come this blue eyed woman is so smart? I cannot believe she just said that. Then, I felt her swinging our hands. "I know you feel it" She pressed and I rolled my eyes. "Yes, I do."

I didn't know what her reaction is going to be so I looked at her and she was smiling big and her eyes are really telling me something. This woman is just full of surprises. Sometimes, you can't just believe what's going on. I had this first expression of her being ill mannered but I had it all wrong.

Then, we entered the restaurant . . .

**Sorry guys for cutting this short but I really need to get to my class. I promise I will make it up to you. I will make chapter 4 longer. Love you Guys and I am really, really sorry. But what do you think about this chapter besides being short?**


	4. Chapter 4:Date Gone Wrong

**Hello Guys! I am really glad you like this story and I seem to enjoy this pretty well. I really am getting into the skin of the characters. They are my own version of Christian and Ana. Thanks to joyce Phillips, Christian618, Meg, Pielietje, kaycad742, shan36, CollegeGrad2016, SpeakFromTheHeart, ISana55 and APEJEN for the reviews. Here is chapter 4. Enjoy!**

**CHAPTER 4: DATE GONE WRONG**

**CPOV**

Me and Ana held hands the whole time we went inside the restaurant. We were greeted by a waiter and I ordered a table for two. "Right here Sir" He led us to the left corner of the room where we can see people entering the place. I don't mind though and I am sure Ana doesn't too. I pulled a chair so she can sit and she smiled sweetly at me. Maybe it was really an unexpected gesture. I sat across her and the waiter handed the menu book.

I am used to being here so I told Ana, "You should try their vegetable salad. It's the best." She nodded at me and I looked at the waiter. "Well, we are going to have two vegetable salads and two glasses of wine." Then, the waiter gets the two menu books and heads out of our sight.

Ana cleared her throat before saying, "So, what are your hobbies, Christian?"

I thought deeply and answered, "I love to play the piano." I don't know why but her jaw just dropped when I said that. What? Is it weird to see me playing the piano? Everyone can know exactly that I am a piano man by the way they just look at me.

"Why is your expression like that?" I asked her curiously.

"Well . . ." She's getting more serious now and I raised my brows at that. Her eyes suddenly turned sad and longing. She finally spoke, "Well, ever since I lost my husband and kids, I went to therapy. They said I needed to do something to express all my emotions so I started singing and I admit I am not a good singer. Here's the thing; I have this plan to enter a singing competition and having a minus one music's painful to hear especially to the ears of oldies." Uh oh. . . I think I don't like where this conversation is heading.

"Can you please play the piano for me while I sing? It would surely mean a lot to me." I rolled my eyes at her and murmured, "seriously?" She nodded at me with that child-like smile and it's freaking cute. _Stop it, Christian! Don't let that_ _cutie cute cute smile deceive you!_ I shook my head then replied, "Anastasia, I don't want to do it."

She smiled at me and giggled. When she was about to say something, the waiter arrived with our orders. I gave him a fifty dollar tip and I am glad he was happy. "What were you saying?" I turned my attention back to Ana who is now eating the vegetable salad with so much delight. "I like your straightforwardness but the proposal is still open until Monday" I took a bite of my salad.

"What's with Monday?"

"Well, that's the day I am going to register for the competition so I am still hoping you'd change your mind." She said it with a smile and I laughed a little. "Who's more straightforward? You or me?"

"Me, of course. . . I was the one who asked you out, remember?" I giggled at that. _What? Christian, stop it! Stop giggling! This isn't you! You never did that with Elena! _My face turned serious and I spoke clearly, "How could I forget?" I raised my glass of champagne and she tossed it with hers. I was so formal and she's like . . . like . . . just Ana!

We were silent for awhile so I decided to bring up a topic. "So Ana, can you tell me more about yourself?" She stared at me plainly then replied, "Promise you won't be remorseful of me?" I nodded at her. What the fuck is this woman trying to tell me?

She took a deep breath before saying, "I am Anastasia Rose Steele, supposed to be Rodriguez but I spoke to my lawyer about that and he agreed. I am twenty three years old and I never met my father because he died when I was baby. You know, military men. They die unexpectedly. The only father I knew was Ray. He was my Mom's second husband. She's with her fourth husband now, happily married.

When I was in college, I met Jose and we were really great friends. When I was eighteen, we had a one night stand which left me pregnant. He married me because of that but each day, we fell in love more deeply and our small arguments and big fights really made us strong.

My son JJ was every little thing to me. I mean, he was my world and that baby girl growing inside me was too but some people are just reckless drivers! We were hit by a car and the policemen figured out that it was a drunken man and I am still trying to find out who it was because I am going to kill him with my bare hands. I woke up in the hospital, going hysterical because my family died and I was alone. I went to therapy and from time to time, I get healed. If I get to participate in this contest, it would mean a lot to me and to my kids."

I am just speechless. My mouth opened at what she said. So, it's just not me, huh? Some people do have fucked-up lives. It's just not me. Okay, that really discourages me of the little thought that I am God's most hated person. Well, I was just left here speechless in front of this woman.

"What about you? Tell me more about yourself."

"Well, I have a business but my father currently runs it for the meantime. I used to live in Escala but yeah . . . authorities don't trust me. They think I can kill a person without even thinking of it." I answered her and her expression was somewhat awkward. It looks like she's not satisfied of my answer.

"Is that it? Tell me a lot. Like a lot." She ordered and I frowned.

"I don't want to share!" I told her without hesitance.

"It's unfair!"

"It's not! I just asked you to say something more about yourself and not your life story so it's just fair if I don't share my own fucked up life story."

"Okay fine!" Miss smart mouth finally gives up and hallelujah! I am not forced to share the events that happened in my life. I was about to speak but the world just stopped the moment I saw those two hideous people enter this restaurant. It was the female Judas and with her is the man that I almost stabbed a hundred times if I was just given the chance. They linked their arms together and I feel my hands tighten the hold of the spoon and fork.

"Christian, are you alright?" Ana asked me but I cannot bear to answer. I still stared at those two people who are negotiating with the waiter. Ana looked at them the same time they did also. Fine! I lost it! I stood up and headed straight to the waiter they were talking to. I literally threw a thousand dollars to his face and headed outside, ignoring those two worthless people.

"Mr. Grey!" Taylor called my name but I ignored him by walking fast. Nevertheless, he followed me. "Christian! Christian!" It wasn't Taylor who called me. It was Ana. I still walked though and boy! She was a fast runner. She stood in front of me and I stopped walking.

"Christian, what happened? Your eyes are so mad and red!" She said between breaths and I am still so . . . angry. "Leave me alone!" I told her before walking out of her sight. She still followed me and said, "Christian! Please talk to me! What the fuck just happened? Why did you turn so mad?!" I looked at her and answered, "Leave me alone!"

Maybe she's not behind my back anymore because things went silent until she spoke, "What?! That blonde was your Ex-fiancé? Cougar Mrs. Demi Moore Robinson just got in and you decide to ruin our date?!" That's it! I was raging in anger and as I reached her, I yelled "LEAVE ME ALONE!" Afterwards, I slapped her . . . hard.

My eyes widened at that. What have I done?! She looked back at me with tearful eyes. "Ana, I didn't mean it. I lost it. I am sorry. I really am sorry. Ana, please." She shook her head and cried before running away from me. I stared at where she left and I just fucking hate myself. I screamed in the middle of the street and I found myself on my knees. I just became a monster!

"Time to go home" I hear Taylor from behind but I just cried like shit with all the people staring at me.

**What do you think Guys? If you were Ana, would you forgive him or not? Well, I wanna ask again . . . despite this incident, will you still read this? Thanks!**


	5. Chapter 5: Yes

**Good Morning, Guys! Awwweee... I had 23 reviews for my last chapter and I love it! Thank you so much kturner1187, Nermina25, meg, guest, jess, Christian618, j macphail, Kate, Isana55, pookiebear3, kaycad742, CollegeGrad2016, Pielietje, JpearlQT, rgmoonstar33, som04, kzahn1990, jms-83, APEJEN, MsKarbla, Skgcsandra, SpeakFromTheHeart & Sham36. Thanks a lot guys!**

**CHAPTER 5: YES**

**APOV**

"He fucking slapped you?!" Ethan's face was furious when I told him what happened on Christian and I's disastrous date. Ethan became extra close to me after the accident and he has been the most remorseful people and I don't know why. "Ethan, I am sure Christian didn't mean it. He was just angry!" Part of me is mad at Christian. What woman would be happy if a guy slapped her? Well, a bigger part of me is mad at myself because if I just listened to him and kept my mouth shut, it couldn't have happened.

Ethan's face was still angry and he pursed his lips and clenched his teeth. He shook his head so many times and I got annoyed. "What?" Ethan looked at me then replied, "You're _about_ to fall for a fucked up man." I rolled my eyes at that. I never really wanted anyone to interfere in my decisions and what's worse is that they'd always judge me and the people around me.

"Seriously Ana, he just hit you and you too are just friends. How much more if you'll be together? Are you sure he's not going to punch you or do anything to let your blood spill?" He raised his voice a little but I remained calm.

"You are exaggerated" I stated.

He rolled his eyes then said, "Ana, please your safety is concerned here! This is a serious matter!"

"Ethan, I am pretty sure as hell that Christian is a good person. He just experienced a lot of adversities in life. He's just like me, you know, broken and fucked up. You know what they say, 'turn your face towards the sun and the shadows will fall behind you'? Consider me as his first step to that. I could be the reason that he'll look at that sun." Ethan and I stared at each other afterwards. Gosh! I know that face! That is the judgmental face of Ethan Kavanagh. I grabbed my brown coat from the foyer and just left without a goodbye. Ethan was not my confidante today. It is simply because he disapproves of me liking Christian.

As I walked home, I thought of Christian Grey. I cannot deny the first time I saw him, I was in awe. He was really handsome but he offended me and I cried a lot. No one ever said those things to me but as the week passed, I thought more and more about him and somehow, when I see his face in the internet, I'd always caught myself smiling and my heart beat fast. I have this faith that he is going to like me back. Although he slapped me a week ago, I still blamed myself for that. I should've left him alone.

The rain started to pour and I ran and ran . . . Suddenly, a memory came back.

_A year ago . . ._

_I was washing the dishes when JJ came home. I prepared myself for his sweet greeting and hug. I turned my back and I am worried to see him soaking wet in the rain. I immediately ran to him and scolded tenderly, "Didn't I tell you to always bring your raincoat on? It could rain anytime!" He was frowning._

"_I am so sorry, Momma." _

"_I don't want you to get sick, okay? I want you to be safe and sound."_

"_I am really sorry" This is one thing I like about my son. He's such an angel. He is very sensitive to the emotions of others and he knows how to say sorry. I hope he brings this characteristic when he grows up. I hugged him and whispered in his ear, "It's alright, darling" I pulled back afterwards and took off his wet clothes. He needs a bath. _

_Then, I feel his small hands on my stomach and said to it, "Hey Baby, your Big Bro loves you. Momma and Daddy and I can't wait for your arrival." I smiled at that. He was so excited to see his baby sister. Well, he won't see her for at least three months. "Come on, let's go" I lead him to the bathroom afterwards._

_-end flashback-_

I started to tear up at that memory. I paused in the middle of the street and the rain poured down hard as it is. I stared sorrowfully at the ground. I miss my little boy so much. I miss the way he calls me 'Mommy' and the way he loves us. Why did God take him and not me? He should have lived and go to middle school. Then, he'd be a jock in high school and he will graduate college. He'd be a professional and he'll get married to have a lot of kids. I'd be the supportive grandmother with Jose by my side. Dreams are just made to be shuttered.

Why did my life turned out like this? I put my hands on my face and silently sobbed. And then, why is it that I still hear the sound of the rain but I don't feel it falling on me. I put my hands down and saw Christian Grey holding a black umbrella, protecting both of us from the rain. He looked refine actually while I look like a maid.

We stared at each other for a long time. I cannot believe that he's here, having an umbrella above us. "I am really sorry, Ana. It was not my intention. I am so guilty. I, I—uh. . . I don't beat women when they don't all—Oh God Ana! I really don't know what to say! Ana, Ana . . ." His sentences were full of stuttering. What I did is put my finger on his mouth and hushed him. I hugged him tight and I feel his arm hesitantly hugging me back.

I pulled back afterwards with a smile on my face. He wiped away the tears from my face and I wonder how he knew it when my face was wet because of the rain. He said to me, "I changed my mind" I raised my brows at hat. What is he talking about?

"About what?"

"About your proposal" My eyes widened in joy and my mouth opened with such a surprised expression. "Uh. . . uh . . . uh . . ." It's my time to be speechless now. He did what I did earlier. He placed his pointer on my mouth and my lips lifted up for a smile. "I am going to play the piano for you. It's Monday, what do you say? We shall register." I laughed at him with the sound of rain mixing with my laughter.

**So, the Oscars are scheduled today and I want Jennifer Lawrence to win. My version of Ana in this story is based on her role in the Silver Linings Playbook. She did a fantastic job! I also have this certainty that Anne Hathaway (Les Mis) and Daniel Day Lewis (Lincoln) will win. Ah! I cannot wait. **

**BTW, what do you think of this chapter? **


	6. Chapter 6: Clean Slate

**Hey Guys! I haven't updated for four days because I have been very busy. School is going to end in two weeks and portfolios are killing me. Thanks to , Amez711, Pielietje, Guest, meggan-sa, APEJEN, kturner1187, kaycad742, jess, ISana55, christian618, 10zahbash, shan36, pookiebear3, MsKArbla and bunni0407 for the reviews!**

**CHAPTER 6: CLEAN SLATE**

**CPOV**

To see Ana walk away from me was more painful than seeing Elena with Isaac. I really hate myself for slapping her. She didn't deserve to be treated like that. Our date was going well but why does that female Judas have to enter the restaurant with Isaac? She's ruining every moment of my life!

I am so lucky Ana forgave me. If you slap a woman, there is no way in hell that she is going to forgive you for what you did. Ana's just extraordinary. Is she real? How can she manage to forgive me after hurting her physically? I never ever thought she would forgive me after I shared my umbrella with her when she cried under the rain. Believe me I know what she feels now. She probably feels the way that I do. We are living in the dark and we don't know what we are living for.

"Why did you change your man?" Ana whose wet interrupted my thoughts. I stared at her with a smirk then replied, "What do you think?" She blushed a little at that and it is very cute and when I say cute, no pessimist going to argue.

"I really can't think of anything right now." She replied.

"I wonder why"

"Well, we are sharing an umbrella right now and it feels just like the movies. You know, under the rain and stuff!" She laughed hard and I did too. She doesn't know what to say. Her words really made no sense at all. Here we are laughing under the bitter rain. Who would've thought I'd laugh with Ana Steele? We met in a really bad way. I never even thought that we would be friends.

"But really, why did you change your mind?" She pressed.

I took a deep breath and smiled at her. "Well, I had a session with Dr. Flynn yesterday and it changed my mind. I was supposed to give up and continue my fucked-up life but he made me realize things."

"What are those things? Is it something about you realizing you like me?" She smirked a little at me and I giggled at her straightforwardness. She really is something.

_YESTERDAY_

"_Can you believe it? I goddamn slapped her on the face! Can you believe it? We were on a date, we were on a freaking date and I walked out so mad and slapped her. For the millionth time, I slapped her! What's more hurting is that she walked away from me while crying! I cannot bare the pain!" I put my palm on my weary face and Flynn stared at me, raising one eyebrow. _

"_Well, what can you say?" I asked him. Why isn't he saying anything? He is a doctor and he should know every medicine to my sick words. He is a freaking therapist and he must do his job well. _

"_Christian, I thought we have this therapy to talk about the problems you have with Elena and not with Ana." He told me in his calm voice._

"_Well, Elena's not a problem right now." To my dismay, he laughed so hard and it was obvious that his stomach is hurting. I just stared at him with angry eyes. I came here to therapy to calm myself and not to get mad again. I am trying my best to not slap this Doctor in front of me. His laughter faded after a few seconds and he cleared his throat, formal again._

"_Well, what?" I asked._

"_You are falling for Ana" He said and I was taken back. That wasn't the answer I was expecting. "What the fuck are you saying? I am obviously not falling for a widow who acts so crazy!" I battled. I am obviously not falling for her._

"_Well, why are you reacting that way?" He asked._

"_Because. . . Because. . . Because. . ." For the first time, I am lost for words. I am very speechless. Why did I feel that way when Ana walked out from me? I know that it is guilt. It is really guilt. "Because I am guilty!" I finally found words. _

_Dr. Flynn stared at me with a disappointed expression. "Christian, let me tell you something. Guilt is a bugging feeling within your heart and it is not breaking it. When you hurt someone and your heart just broke then that is love. Christian, since Ana came it's not just about Elena anymore. You forget about her and all our sessions are just about Ana. Ana, Ana, Ana and Ana! Ana this and Ana that! You talk about her more than Elena."_

"_That's because I loved Elena and I hate Ana." I reasoned._

"_You felt lust with Elena, Christian. Love means caring for someone's happiness more than your own. If you really love Elena, you would be happy for her right now even if it hurts you and you wouldn't have almost killed them." I stared at him in awe for what he said. For the very first time in my life, I begin to doubt about my feelings for Elena. Did I really love her? _

_Dr. Flynn added, "Here's what you need to do. I can see your sun now. Ana is the one. She's going to let you come out from that dark world you are living in if you'll just let her. What you need to do is start with a clean slate. Never think of Elena. Never compare her to Ana because the two of them are very different. Forget the past. Erase it and start again."_

That was Dr. Flynn's advice for me. I never ever thought that I would take it. That night, I prayed to God after a year of forgetting Him. After my prayer, it seemed that I thought of Ana so much. She looked really beautiful and cute. Well, she is cute even if she is wearing that hideous brown coat. Her hair flows down and it's got an amazing effect on me which I cannot explain. That was the night I decided to clean my slate.

"Earth to Christian?" Ana smiled at me with her waving hand.

"Yes" I told her.

"Yes what?"

"I like you" I told her and she froze. She looked at me as if she saw a ghost. "What?" I asked her. Her expression's pretty weird. She shook her head and grabs my hand to go inside the hotel.

"What are we doing here? You are not sleeping with me, are you?" I asked her anxiously. I am not really sure if having sex with her is a great and helpful part to my clean slate.

"I am not that straightforward, okay? We are here for the registration, remember?" Her voice was a little bit sour when she said that. I laughed at that though I wasn't embarrassed at my wrong assumption. I guess I am really dirty minded.

Luckily, the line was so short so Ana registered our names. Her face was so bright when she wrote it. I really liked her expression and I liked the fact more that it is because of me that she is happy like this.

"Thank you for joining the contest! By the way, you are a cute couple." The black registrar told us and I was about to protest but Ana said, "Thank you!" We held hands the whole time we went out of the hotel.

"Rehearsals start tomorrow, okay? Just go to Kate's studio" She told me as she lets go of my hand. "I'll be right there" I promised her and she waved goodbye. I watched her walk from me and when I was about to turn my back, she called out my name, "Christian!" I looked at her and she is running towards me. What the hell is going on? Then, she wrapped her hands around my neck and pressed her lips against mine. I was shocked at first but it just felt . . . right. I cupped her cheeks and kissed her back. I felt the sensation and it is overwhelming. When the kiss was getting deeper, she pulled away and smiled, "Just in case it wasn't clear, I like you too." She told me before running home.

I watched her . . . dazed. I've never felt anything more beautiful than that kiss. I just stood there with my fingers caressing my lips even if it began to rain.

**What do you think of this chapter, guys? For the first time, I considered my story to have more than thirty chapters. I realized thirty chapters are just too small. Anyways, I thank you guys because you seem to really like this story even though they are a lot different from the characters of EL James. **

**P.S. In every story I create, there is a song so I decided 'Turning Page' by Sleeping At Last for this story.**

**Thanks Guys!**


	7. Chapter 7: Rehearsals

**Happy Sunday to you all! I am so thankful that I can update today. I would like to thank Joyce Phillips, tjett523, kaycad742, MrsCTGrey, Shan36, ISanna55, APEJEN, Gary12, Christian618, Amez711 and Pielietje for the reviews. It's my source of strength to continue on writing. **

**CHAPTER 6: REHEARSAL**

**CPOV**

**Tuesday**

I arrived at Kavanagh Studios and as what I expected, Ana was patiently waiting there. She still wears that big brown coat but what's under it is the beige dress she wore when we had that date. She was holding a folder as she waved at me. "You're early" she complimented.

"Well, I promised I'd be." I answered. She grabs my arm and she leads me to a spacious room surrounded by classic posters and the grand piano at the middle. "Kate's father owns this place. She's not really interested in music at all." I nodded at what she said. I am really not interested to learn more about Katherine Kavanagh because I hate blondes and I know she doesn't like me.

"Shall we start?" She asked me and I nodded at her. I walked across the room and sat on the chair of the grand piano. She handed me the papers which contained the notes of the song. I examined it and it was 'I Love You' by Celine Dion. I raised my brow at her. "Why did you choose this song?" I asked her. I think this song is gay. It's too emotional. I cannot love this.

She rolled her eyes at me. "What? You're rolling your eyes now?" I teased her. I have been comfortable doing that since she kissed me. The moment her lips pressed against my own, the pessimist in me just died and I know I am going to forget Elena. Ana just has this power on me. Now, none of us wants to remind ourselves that we kissed. Our feelings are still unclear.

"Come on, Christian! I am so in love with this song!" She told me with that puppy dog eyes and wow! I shook my head then nodded. "Fine. Fine. Fine." I gave in.

Then, she cleared her throat and signalled me to play the notes on the piano. My fingers tenderly played the piano and I looked at her every passing time. She stared at me playing as if she hasn't seen anyone played good like that before. She hummed throughout the whole time I played. I found the notes really easy. I have been playing the piano since I was six so it's just easy for me now. The song ended with her still open mouthed at me.

"Wow!" I can sense the sincerity in her voice.

"Come on, let's do it with you singing the song." I told her but she was still in awe. "Wow! Since when did you learn how to play the piano?" She asked. I answered; "Since I was six" She smiled hugely at what I said.

"Now, can you sing the song?" I asked her and she nodded quickly. She stood up and cleared her throat. "I am not that great singer, okay? You better get prepared for my mediocre voice." She warned me and I just laughed. I began to play and when the intro got over, she started to sing.

**I must be crazy now****  
****Maybe I dream too much****  
****But when I think of you****  
****I long to feel your touch**

**To whisper in your ear****  
****Words that are old as time****  
****Words only you would hear****  
****If only you were mine**

She was right. Her voice is not as captivating as Adele nor as attractive as Taylor Swift but every time she sang, I felt the emotions going through her heart and mind. I know that this is her form of therapy but it sends me goosebumps. We continued to practice and I felt every single emotion she got.

**Wednesday**

"So, you like being rich, huh?" She laughed along with me. We are having a break now after hours of rehearsal. We are sitting on the ground, cross legged while eating a Chinese food. We just came up with the topic of how much I earn when I was still running my business.

"It's really nice when you are rich. It's the stability that I like." I replied formally. When it talks about money, I become formal. I seriously earn one hundred thousand dollars per hour and it's not something to be just joking around at. Some people in this world cannot eat. I know what it feels like to have an empty stomach for days and it hurts. I am very thankful that I can earn money like that.

"So, your father's going to permanently run the business?" Ana asked.

"No, of course not! When I get ready and when I am emotionally stable, I can manage to run it again." I told her as I continued to eat. I have been really hungry so I ate and ate. I looked up at her and she was staring at me with a mysterious look on her eyes.

"What?"

Then, she came back to her senses and shakes her head. She laughed at herself a little. Afterwards, she said, "I was thinking maybe you should share your life story now because I am dying to know." I paused at that and thought deeply. Yes, I know Ana is a good person and she is trustworthy but that piece of me is very sensitive. I cannot just share it like that.

"I am sorry, Ana. I am just not ready." I told her and she quickly nodded. I love how understanding she is.

"Ana? Christian?" We heard a voice coming inside the room and it was Kate. She stood there right in front of us. Ana stood up and ran to her. They hugged each other so tight and when Ana pulled back, she said, "Oh thank you so much Kate for letting me use this studio for free! Thank you! It is such a huge help for us!"

"Ana, you've been like my sister for years. There's no need to thank me." She told her. Ana kissed her cheek and she playfully slapped her. They just laughed along. They seem to be like Elliott and me. They treat each other as sisters and it is pretty obvious that they have this strong bond.

"Christian, how are you?" She asked me.

I stood up and replied, "Well, I am fine." I still don't like Kate even though she is the best friend of Ana. I really don't know why. It was obvious in her eyes that she doesn't like me too.

"Great! So . . . I just stopped by to check on you. It seems that you both are really doing well." She told us.

"Yes, we are" I said.

"Well, we are having an engagement party at your parents' house, Christian. It will be held this Saturday. Please come, okay?" She informed us and both of us nodded. I immediately looked at Ana then told her, "You are going to be my date." I can hear Kate's giggle after I said that.

**Thursday**

**I wish I could go back to the very first day I saw you****  
****Should've made my move when you looked in my eyes****  
****'Cause by now I know that you'd feel the way that I do****  
****And I'd whisper these words as you'd lie here by my side******

**I love you, please say****  
****You love me too, these three words****  
****They could change our lives forever****  
****And I promise you that we will always be together****  
****Till the end of time**

"That's a wrap, Ana! You really sounded great!" I told her and she smiled. "I couldn't have done it without my great pianist. You have been really great with me." With that, she hugged me tight and I was shocked at first. I surrendered to her touch and wrapped my arms around her back also.

Our embrace was stopped when someone cleared his throat. We looked at that person and it was Ethan. Great! This guy doesn't like me either so yeah, I don't like him also. "Ethan!" Ana greeted him. He smiled at her then said, "I just want to check if you are being safe." I gritted my teeth at that.

"I have no intention to harm her." I told him.

"Am I talking about you?" He replied cockily and I am getting mad now. I breathed fast and I am sure my skin is red now but Ana puts both her hands on my either sides of my shoulders and miraculously, I calmed down.

"Ethan, I am being safe. Christian is pretty awesome. If you got nothing good to say Ethan, please just let us continue to rehearse. Christian doesn't deserve to hear bad things from you." I looked at Ana with a shocked expression. She just stood up for me . . . against her comforter when her family died.

Ethan's faced was hard to explain. It was clear that he was humiliated by what Ana did just now. Still, he remained civilized. "I just heard the news in town that they are moving the contest next week." Me and Ana looked at each other with huge eyes. There is no way in hell that we are ready.

"Since you don't want me here then I'll just go" Ethan told her before walking out. Ana looked brave. I felt guilty still. "I am sorry I have to ruin your friendship with Ethan and-" She silenced me using her pointer.

"You did nothing wrong." She whispered and I am convinced.

**Guys, what do you think of this chapter? Is it good or bad? Next chapter will be the engagement party of Kate and Elliott. Advance thanks to all who will review. I love you all!**


	8. Chapter 8: Party

**Hello Guys! I just have to update before I watch 'Safe Haven'. People say that the movie is amazing and it has a major twist. I know the twist already because I read the book. Speaking of twists, I have this surprise twist for you when the story goes far. By the way, thanks to Amez711, Skgcsandra, Pielietje, Jamilia, Isana55, shan36, christian618, APEJEN, kaycad742, pookiebear3 and JPearlQT for the wonderful and encouraging reviews! **

**CHAPTER 8: PARTY**

**CPOV**

"So, you sure that Ana is with Kate?" I asked Elliott. "Yes, Bro. They will come here together." I nodded at that even though I am nervous. It's the first time she is going to meet my parents as my friend. They already know her but never spoke to her. They once said that Ana was a shy woman so that's the reason why she has fewer friends.

"I am so excited to meet your girlfriend!" My sister, Mia jumped beside me. She has always been the most energetic person I know. My brows furrowed at her as I said, "She is not my girlfriend!"

"You mean 'not yet'" Mia's just so playful and sometimes, it gets super annoying.

"Whatever" I just replied. I cannot say anything right now. I can't just say that she is going to be my girlfriend because I cannot tell the future. I can't also say that she won't be for the same reason. We never know what's going to happen in the future so it's just better to keep our mouth shut.

There are so many people in this house right now. I really don't know some of them. They all look the same to me. They wore long gowns and tux. I love how unique our Grey Men's suits are. Its colour is gray. Thanks to Mia who's so obsessed about fashion. She shopped for our suits and she made Mom's purple dress. I bet she also made Kate a dress.

"Oh, here they are." I heard Elliott said and I suddenly got stiff. I hope Ana will look beautiful. After all, she is my date.

Kate entered the gate with her hair tied up. She wore a dark red gown and Elliott really looked amazed. They hooked arms and I smiled at them both. They are the happiest couple I ever saw. Then, the whole world just stopped the moment a brunette girl entered. She smiled at me. Her hair was braided and put aside her shoulder. Her gown was strapless pink and she wore white gloves. We stared at each other and for the moment, the world is just about the two of us.

"Hi" She greeted when she reached me. "You look beautiful" I told her and she smiled at the ground. "Hey Ana! I am Mia Grey! I love the way the gown fits you." She said. Great! She just ruined a moment!

"Hey Mia! Thank you so much for making this gown." She told her and I raised one brow. Mia made her this? She might have noticed my confused expression so she just said, "Well, I found out that Ana is going to be here so I stayed up late for the gown and handed it to Kate so that she can give it to Ana. I always see Ana here in our town so I estimated her size correctly."

I stood there amazed of my sister. She had never been this supportive. I never thought she would actually do this. Then, my parents entered the scene. "Hello Ana, thanks for coming at our son's engagement party! I am Grace Trevelyan-Grey by the way." Ana paused for a moment then offered her hand for a handshake. Mom took her hand just to pull her close and hug her tight. I smiled at that sight. It seems that everyone here thinks that Ana is going to be my girlfriend.

Mom pulled back and Ana's face was still shocked. "Mrs. Trevelyan-Grey, it's my honour to attend. I've been friends with Kate since college." Her voice shivered a little.

"Darling, call me Grace" Mom told her and she nodded, "Yes . . . Grace" I looked away and smiled. I really don't know why I am laughing. Probably because Ana is so nervous? Then, Dad pulled her in for a hug also. "I am Carrick, Christian's father. Please enjoy yourself, Ana!" Ana smiled at him and she reddened. I cannot control it anymore so I giggled. Afterwards, everyone stared at me as if they heard a ghost.

"What?" I smiled and offered my arm to Ana. She hooked her arms with mine and I said to everyone, "We'll go to our table". I walked Ana to our table and Ethan Kavanagh was there. It was still awkward for me to talk to Ethan after what happened last Wednesday.

"Hi Ethan!" Ana greeted him and he smiled sincerely at her.

"Christian, man, I would like to apologize for my behaviour. It was so ill mannered of me." My eyes widened at what he said. Did he just apologize? I can hear Ana laugh. She laughed as if Ethan never said sorry to anyone. "Well, I forgive you." I told him and he nodded.

After a few minutes, Mia arrived and sat beside Ethan. "Elliott's going to speak now. I really love the theme of their wedding!" Ana and I smiled at her. Where does she get all these energy? Then, she took a glance at Ethan and the glance turned into a stare. My God! This is so awkward for us to see.

"Hi! I am Mia Grey!" She offered her hand.

"I am Ethan Kavanagh." He answered and they shook hands. We can feel the spark between the two of them. Whoa. Really? My sister and Kate's brother? I can see it now. Their time was interrupted when Elliott spoke at the microphone. "Hello? Hello? Mike Test?" He cleared his throat.

"I would like to thank everybody for coming to this engagement party. Only two months to go and I'd have Kate as my wife. I pinch myself every time I say that. This feels like a fantasy." Everyone laughed as response. "Anyway, I would like to announce that 23rd June would be the date of our wedding and it's a garden wedding. My sister, Mia is going to take care of everyone's clothing. My brother, Christian will be the maid of honor and Ana, Kate's bestfriend will be the bridesmaid." Ana and I smiled at each other.

Elliott continued, "You are all invited to come to our wedding and please, enjoy your meal." He signalled us to eat.

Mia and Ethan talked so much. Ana and I just stared at them. It's as if they don't see us at all. I want to talk to Ana so bad but yeah, Mia and Ethan are just so loud. "Dance time everyone!" My father announced over the microphone after thirty minutes. The music started to play.

**Some day, when I'm awfully low,****  
****When the world is cold,****  
****I will feel a glow just thinking of you****  
****And the way you look tonight.**

Kate and Elliott were the first ones to dance followed by all the other couples. I stared at Ana who is looking at everybody. "Ana?" She looked at me. "Would you like to dance?" She smiled at me and took my hand. We went to the dance floor, not minding those peering eyes.

"I don't really know how to dance." She said. I smiled at her then said, "Chin up" She did so. "Put you right hand on my shoulder because I will put mine in your waist" We did so. "Then, hold hands" Our hands lingered as we start to dance. I guided her the whole time we danced.

**Yes you're lovely, with your smile so warm****  
****And your cheeks so soft,****  
****There is nothing for me but to love you,****  
****And the way you look tonight.**

"You are a great dancer!" She told me and I swung her more. I glanced at the people around us and I caught my parents staring at us. I smiled at them and they did also. Their smile was so sincere. I haven't seen that for a year.

Ana twirled around and we just laugh at each other. I love dancing with her. Then, the music stopped and Ana said, "I am thirsty" I lead her to the table to get champagne. As I handed her the glass, someone bumped into me causing the red champagne to spill on her dress. FUCK! I glared at that person who just bumped right into me. It was a kid from our neighbourhood.

"Did you just see what you do?!" The kid looked apologetic but I had no remorse.

"Christian, he's just a kid." Ana told me. "Well, he just caused me to spill champagne to you!" I reasoned and she shook her head. She told the kid, "Boy, its okay. Go to your parents." I rolled my eyes at her.

"He reminds me of my son." Ana said as she stared deeply at the boy. Right! She's nice to kids because she had a son. The atmosphere turned sad. She might have known because she shook her head and asked, "What are we going to do now?"

"Come with me" I told her. I lead her inside our house. I opened the door of my childhood room and turned on the lights. She stared around the room as I grabbed a shirt from my teen years and tossed it to her. "Here, that's the only shirt that could fit you and here are the shorts." I handed her my blue shorts. She took it and smiled. This would simply mean that we can't get out now. We have to spend some time here and wait for all the guests to come home. She signalled me to turn around and so I did.

I cannot take it so I took a glimpse at her. Her exposed back looked so sexy. She was facing behind and she's with her bra and panties. I stared at how sexy she is and how she's turning me on. When she's finished changing, I turned my head back.

"You can look now" She said and I looked at her. We stared at each other for awhile and the silence was taking over. She suddenly asked, "Who's that woman in the picture right behind me?" My guard turned on after what she asked. She's referring to my crackwhore of a Mom. With that, I took a seat on my childhood bed and Ana sat right beside me.

"Let me in, Christian." She begged me. Am I ready to tell her the truth? Am I ready to make her see how a bad person I was? She already gave me all her stories and it's unfair if I won't. I know Ana is trustworthy and I know she'd never judge me.

"Ana, this is my story . . ."

**I got to admit I love this chapter very much. I enjoyed writing this one and I am so happy that this is longer. Well, guys, what do you think? Is it good, bad, great? What's your opinion? Thank you for reading guys! ;)**


	9. Chapter 9: Open Up

**Hello Readers! I am currently watching 'Project Runway 9' and wow! Creativity's really a big factor. Anyways, as usual, I would like to say thank you to pookiebear3, christian618, shan36, ISana55, Amez711, APEJEN, meggan-sa, Guest, and kturner1187 for the amazing reviews. They really encouraged me to continue this story.**

**CHAPTER 9: OPEN UP**

**CPOV**

"Ana, this is my story . . ." I took a deep breath and she waited patiently for me to speak. "Go on, Christian. I would always listen." She told me and I stared at her long before I begun to tell my story.

"Before I was adopted by the Greys, my real mother was a crackwhore. She had a pimp and he was very abusive of me. My mother just lied down, not stopping him of what he did. What's terrifying the most is that he uses my chest as his ashtray. I remember those days when I am hungry and my mother's just lying cold on the floor." I looked at Ana and she can't hide the shock in her face. Nevertheless, she told me the sign to continue on.

"Well, Dr. Trevelyan-Grey found me and she welcomed me to the family. Elliott was a very nice big brother and Carrick was never like the pimp but that didn't make me speak for two years. The first word I spoke was 'Mia'. She was really adorable and cute. When she came, the family just rejoiced not just because of her but also the reason that they heard my voice."

"Then?" Ana encouraged me to continue but I shook my head. "I am not sure if you are going to stay after I tell you this."

"I'd always stay" She promised.

I took a deep breath with the thought that I am prepared if she will leave me after this. "When I was fifteen, I was engaged to a sexual relationship with my mother's friend. She's fifteen years older than me." I looked at her reaction and her eyes widened. "Elena did that?" She barely whispered and I nodded. "What kind of sexual relationship?" She added, asking a question.

"Well, it's what you call BDSM. There's always got to be a Dominant and a Submissive. Well, it's sex but the Dominant uses toys over the Sub and when the Sub misbehaves, there's always got to be a punishment." Ana stared at me with brows furrowed and eyes narrowed. She curled her lip and she really looked mad.

"Did that Demi Moore Mrs. Robinson Cougar Paedophile punish you?" Oh yes, she's angry. Her voice raised and she looked red.

"Well, yes."

"How?"

"Whips, Belts, Pad-"

"I don't want to hear it!" She interrupted me as she covered her ears. I laughed bitterly at her. "I don't think you're going to like what's happened next." She looked at me then said, "Come on Christian, believe me, I will listen."

"Well, that kind of relationship lasted for six years. It only stopped when her husband found out. Then, I spent five years as a businessman and a Dominant to Subs who looked like my mother." I braced myself for her scared reaction but she looked at me with that understanding expression. That look caused me to just continue to speak.

"Well, she came to me one day and confessed her love to me. I was feeling cloud nine. I also told her that I love her and things went fast. One minute we told everybody and then, we are finally engaged and when the day of our wedding came, she didn't show up. I found out that she's about to get married to another guy and . . . I almost killed them." I poured my heart out.

"That's why you went to jail." Ana stated with a velvet voice. She just nodded her head then said, "I understand" That's it? That's freaking it? Why isn't she looking scared? Why isn't she walking away?

"Aren't you afraid that I might lose temper and kill you? Aren't you afraid of what I was? Doesn't it scare you that you look like that woman in the picture?" I blurted out so many questions to her. Then, with a simple gesture, she wrapped her arms around my neck and sat on my lap. She whispered to me, "I am not scared, Christian. Your past doesn't define who you are and as for your condition as an ex-convict, I am not afraid." I stared at her as if she came from another planet. She really looked sincere and sympathetic.

"I don't know what to say." I told her. And to my surprise, she pressed her lips to mine and I found myself kissing back. I cupped her face with my hands and I forced her mouth to open. Then, our tongue danced together in synchronization. Her hands went to my black suit and she pulled it off. What's left is my long sleeved white shirt. I felt her hands unbuttoning it so I stopped kissing her and held her hands.

"Don't" I tell her.

"Please Christian, trust me." She begged with that puppy dog blue eyes. I still shook my head. I don't think I can handle anyone touch me in that area. "Please Christian, please." She kissed my face multiple times and I tilted her head so that I can kiss her lips. Then, she unbuttoned my shirt and I pulled away from the kiss. I was stiff. I breathed fast as she opened all the buttons. Then, the shirt was out of my body and was thrown on the floor.

She stared at the scars on my chest and for the first time in my life, it got touched. Her fingers lingered tenderly on the scars on my chest. She leaned her face to my chest and kissed each one of them. I closed my eyes each time she did that and to my shock, I like how she touches me. It's not the familiar touch of hate and hurt that I am feeling.

What happened is that I fingers found its way to the hem of her shirt or rather, my shirt. I pulled it up, leaving her only wearing bra. She lifted her head up so she can kiss my lips passionately and deeply. She unclasped her own bra and threw it down the floor. I palmed her riches and I heard her moan. "You're beautiful, Ana" I whispered in her ear and the night continued to be so passionate and full of . . . love. She moaned my name each time I thrust into her and every time she touches me, I ran out of breath.

When we finished, we heard the sounds of the fireworks and the colours reflected in my room through the window. Ana must have thought I was asleep so I just felt her watch the colours around my room. Her hands were on my chest and it bugged me a little bit. "I love you, Christian." She whispered in my ear and kissed my lips once more.

**Okay, so should I rate my story T or M? I just felt like this scene should be a little bit graphic because I know these things are a huge factor. What do you think of the scene? Is it too awkward? I understand if you think so because it's my first time doing this one. Grrrrrrr... I really hope it doesn't suck. Over all, what do you think? Please leave a comment... please... please... **


	10. Chapter 10: Confrontation

**Good Morning Guys! Does anyone of you watch 'Pretty Little Liars'? I am so mad when they revealed that Ezra has a son! I have loved Ezra and Aria for a long time and I have this strong feeling that they are going to end. Meanwhile, Spencer's gone mad after she finds Toby's dead body in the woods. Btw, I would like to thank shan36, ISana55, MrsCTGrey, pookiebear3, hersar1997, christian618, Guest, APEJEN, Pielietje, Really True Love, , kaycad742, Amez711, meggan-sa and kturner1187 for the uplifting reviews. **

**CHAPTER 10: CONFRONTATION**

**APOV**

I woke up feeling the ray of sun on my body. I yawned and started to think of what happened last night. I smiled at that. I can't find a word on how it felt when he touched me. We moved together as one and there is no greater feeling than that. Our connection made me realize that I am in love with him. When he was asleep, I told him that. I need to really find the right time to tell him when he is awake.

My hands searched for him and my eyes opened when I found out that his bedside was empty. I ran my fingers through my hair and took some time to get my vision clear. Where is Christian? I sighed. He must have gone to the bathroom or prepared breakfast. When I did clear up my sight, I grabbed Christian's teenage clothes from the floor. I wore it and went out of his room.

Their house is really beautiful. I haven't been to anywhere like this. I dreamed of living somewhere like this but all dreams just faded away when my family died. I was living this life without knowing what I was living for. When Christian came, that question was answered. I really don't know why he has gotten into me this quick. I know he's fucked up, he beat women a long time ago and he was an ex-convict but like what I said; his past doesn't define who he is.

"Ana?!" I startled a bit as I turned around to find Mia looking at me with a disgusted expression. Shit! She must've thought that I am a slut because of my appearance. You know . . . I am wearing Christian's shirt and I have sex hair? She covered her mouth as she came near me. I blushed and shame overpowered me. I really am stupid. I should've worn that gown again.

"I am really, really sorry, Mia. I really don't want you to have the impression of me as a whore. I really don't want you to think like that. I just . . . ugh! The gown had a stain and Christian led me to his room so I can change into his clothes. Well, one thing led to another and okay, we made love. I really am not a whore so . . . yeah." Mia looked even more shocked. Uh oh. I braced myself for a bunch of painful words that she might throw at me. But unexpectedly, she screamed. Literally. Like a fan girl scream.

"You slept with Christian?" She whispered.

"Uh . . . Yeah, I did." I answered awkwardly and she screamed even more. She jumped and jumped and I found myself laughing at her. She really is adorable and sweet too. "I cannot wait to tell everyone!" She told me and my eyes widened. I don't really want everyone to know that I slept with Christian Grey. Well, because it is a private thing between lovers though I am not sure of what we are.

"I am just joking, Ana! It is really nice to see Christian with someone else now."

I smiled at her and asked, "If you didn't think that I slept with him, why was your expression disgusted when you saw me?" She rolled her eyes and smiled, "Your outfit is really hideous. Come here! I am going to lend you my clothes." She grabbed my hand and upon going towards her room, I asked again, "Where is Christian?"

Mia stared at me with a confused expression. "Well, he left really early. He said he needed to go. He was in a rush." Uh . . . Okay? This isn't normal. Then, I really knew something was wrong when Mia added, "I could've sworn that he didn't get laid. He looked agonized and he was in a rush." I froze at that; something is really wrong.

**Two Days Later . . .**

I tried to contact Christian for these forty eight hours. He hadn't spoken to me since that beautiful night. I confirmed to myself that he regrets what happened that night and that thought felt like a gun shot into my head. Why isn't he speaking to me? I left him a total of three hundred thirty voice mails, called him countless times and texted him a lot. Still, he doesn't let out one word.

I've been waiting here in the studio for thirty minutes now. If he won't come here for two hours, I'll go home and deal with my shitty life again. Where is Christian, really? I know why he is avoiding me. He regrets that night! I always ask myself, "Why can't you just accept the fact that he is not going to love you?" Well, the answer was, "There's a bright hope." Well, that bright hope turned out to be a fact. I know he loves me by the way he touched me that night. There has got to be some reasons why he regrets that night.

_One minute . . . two minutes . . . three minutes . . . four minutes and five, _finally he has arrived.

He opened the door of the room and smiled at me as if nothing happened. "I am so sorry, Ana. Traffic caught me." I didn't answer him. Nevertheless, he continued to sit on the piano chair and warmed up his fingers.

"Why didn't you answer any of my calls? I've left you voice mails, why didn't you call me back?" I asked him, trying to keep my voice calm. He looked at me with a sheepish smile. "I've been really busy" He told me then added, "Why don't we just start with our rehearsals?" He started to play the introduction of the song and I didn't sing on the parts I had to. He stopped playing the piano and looked at me with a confused expression.

"Why aren't you singing?" He asked and I rolled my eyes at him and shook my head. "So, are we playing oblivious now?" He knew what I was talking about so he looked down and he didn't even say one word. Oh God, I just lost it!

"You know what, Christian? It was the most beautiful night I ever had ever since my family died! Then, what happened? I woke up without you by my side. You haven't spoken to me for two days and here you are, acting like nothing happened to us! What are we really Christian?" I folded my arms and he still looked at the ground.

"We're . . . friends" He whispered the last word and my heart just felt like being stabbed by a dagger. Without even realizing it, tears are falling down my face and when he looked at me, he had that worried expression. He stood up and said, "Ana, I am really sorry." He almost wiped away my tears but I removed his hand before he even touched my face.

"You regret that night, Christian! You regret it damn much!" I yelled at him and he looked at me with a pained expression. So what now? He's the one who got hurt. I just spoke the truth!

"I didn't regret it, Ana! I just freaked out when you told me you love me!" He yelled at me and I froze. He was awake that night? We just stared at each other within this intense atmosphere.

I was proud of myself for realizing right now that I didn't regret telling him that. "Why would you freak out?" My voice was calmed and to my surprise and sorrow, his eyes were pouring tears now and he spoke in a hard tone, "You, women are the same. You'd only leave me in the end." I stared at him long enough with a pained expression. With what he said, I slapped him.

"You know how singing helps me?! It helps me express what I feel through the song. That song was for you, Christian! Here I am, telling the world how much I love you and here you are; not trust me." I grabbed my brown coat and walked away from him. Before I opened the door, I looked back at him.

"I love you, Christian and I know you love me too. All you need is trust." With that, I exited that scene and went home with tears running down my cheeks and his tormented expression in my mind.

**So, that was pretty intense. What do you think, Guys? Please review! Haha. Btw, I just want to share what I think. I think that this have been the best story I ever wrote among all the stories I published. Haha. I am really looking forward to write more after this. Well, that could be in the next few months because I am not even halfway done with this story. Thank you sooooo much Guys!**


	11. Chapter 11: Stupid

**Hello Readers! I am so glad that I can update today because I can't for the weekend because I'm going to be very busy. I have finals next week. So, as usual my author's note features my gratitude to the ones who keep on supporting me namely pookiebear3, shan36, hersar1997, ISana55, Christian618, APEJEN, Amez711, Pielietje, Guest, and shanay palmer. Your reviews make me pursue to continue writing this story. I would like to express thanks to those who are following this story and added this to their favourites. **

**CHAPTER 11: STUPID**

**CPOV**

It has been three freaking days without Ana. I cannot just barge inside the studio like we didn't have a fight. I am not even sure if we are going to perform tonight. Well, I am sure that I am not going to go. If I go, I just have to face her anger and wrath. I am not sure if I am ready to face that so yeah, it's better not to go. She probably practiced by herself anyway.

I walked along the street with Ana only on my mind. She has been on my thoughts these past three days. I could just go on with my life and leave her be but I just can't lie that it doesn't kill me. I miss her presence so much. God! I am in the state of utter confusion. Then, my deep thinking was stopped when I bumped into someone.

"Oh, I am really sorry" I apologized to that middle aged woman I just bumped into and when she looked at me, I frowned even more. It's Elena Judas Lincoln.

"Christian, it's so surprising to see you. I didn't expect it." She mumbled and my lips pressed into a hard line. "Well, me too. Now, will you please excuse me?" I walked passed her but she called out my name. "Christian?" I sighed before turning around to face her.

"What do you want?" I asked her in a rough voice. I know she can feel how much I detest her as I asked her that question. She pretended that she didn't feel it and smiled, "Why don't we hang out for awhile? How about we go to this new bakery in town?" I rolled my eyes at her.

"I am going home, Elena." She frowned a little at that.

"I'm sure you can spare an hour." She said and I stared at her for a long time. She patiently waited for my answer. I thought deeply about this. I could have a little time to not think about Ana. "Okay" I told her and she laughed. We walked our way to the bakery she was talking about.

"So, how has life been treating you?" She asked.

"It has been fucked up. It is now fucked up and it will always be fucked up." I answered and she stared at me with narrowed eyes. "I thought you are in love."

I was taken back and I raised my brow at her. "What made you think so?" I asked her. We stopped walking and she sighed, "Well, Christian, I can see it in your eyes and rumours are flying about you and Anastasia Rodriguez." She answered me and I corrected, "Anastasia Steele. I repeat, Anastasia Steele. She forgot her husband, okay?"

"Being jealous over a dead man, Christian?" She teased and I admit that that's not a funny joke. Her smile faded when she realized she had offended me. She cleared her throat and asked, "Anyway, are you really in the mood to go to a bakery? We can just sit on this bench." She pointed towards the black bench that is right behind us.

"Screw Bakery" I mumbled to myself as I sat down the bench. She sat beside me but a few meters away and I like that. I don't want to be attached to this woman anymore. Just the thought of that makes me puke.

"So, how's your life?" I asked her. She smiled at that question. "Well, my life has been really beautiful everyday. Isaac made it better. We decided to stop BDSM and just have a normal relationship. I never thought it would be that sweet, you know?" I laughed bitterly at her. Not because she is happy but because I am jealous. How come people can move on and not me?

"Well, life isn't perfect. Isaac and I found out that I had my menopausal stage and I cannot bear him children. Still, he stayed with me and we adopted an orphan." I stared at her, smiling. This has been the very first thing she mentioned that made me smile. "That was so nice of you, Elena. You just saved a life. Where is she? . . . Or he?" I asked her.

"Well, Isaac took her to the zoo and I cannot come because I just came from an important meeting." She spoke and cleared her throat. "Anyway, stop talking about me. I want to hear about you, Christian. How's the Anastasia Steele romance?"

I took a deep breath at that. "Elena, I really don't want to talk about it."

"Christian, I just want to hear about you. Come on tell me." She convinced and I decided to just tell her. After all, she had been my confidante for years and not once, she told anyone about my secrets.

"Well, I met her at Kavanagh Restaurant and she was very ill mannered. We even had a fight that made her walk out from me. Then, after one week, she asked me out and that date made me realize how beautiful she is. Not just her appearance but her courage to stay strong after her family died." Elena nodded her head. She knows what happened to Ana and I am sure she felt sympathetic.

"Well, I realized I liked her the moment she was apart from me. When she's not with me, something is just empty. I feel like I am not myself when she is not with me. Then . . . then . . . she kissed me and I just can't forget the way it felt. It was also the day I agreed to be her pianist for her contest and I started a bond with her and I just opened up to her like I did to no one before.

What happened afterwards is that my brother had this engagement party and we made love that night. It was my first vanilla sex. I felt loved that night and I heard her whisper to me that she loves me and I got mortified! Things are unclear between us now." I looked at Elena and she had that frustrated expression. Her mouth opened and it took her a second to say, "Seriously, Christian, what the fuck is wrong with you?!" Okay, she had the nerve to ask that?!

"Well, I got mortified because I know that I love her too. I am in love with her and that's what scares me the most! I know she'll just end up leaving me like you did." She looked hurt at what I said and I am not guilty I said that. Then, I felt her hand on my shoulder. I quickly put it away.

"Christian, I am really sorry. I really apologize for what I did to you. Love is just mysterious. I realized too that what we had was lust. It wasn't love." She told me and I nodded, "I realized that too."

"Then, what are you waiting for? It's a once in a lifetime opportunity to have someone who loves you the same way you love them. Christian, never let go. Don't ever let her go. Deal life with her, grow old with her and live for her. That's what life is about. Life is about being with that someone who gives you happiness."

"Dr. Flynn told me that." I told her and my thoughts drifted on Ana.

_. . . Her smile_

_. . . Her blush _

_. . . The way she kissed me_

_. . . The way she makes me laugh_

_. . . The way she sings_

_. . . How she gets mad_

_. . . The way she danced_

_. . . Just the way she is!_

_I love her . . . so much. _

I came back to my senses and stared at Elena. "You know what? I am pretty stupid. I love her and I won't let her slip right through my fingers." Elena nodded at that and her expression changed when I nodded, "I should be with her right now because her contest starts in ten minutes."

"Fuck Christian?!" She stood up and grabbed my arm. "You really are stupid. Let's go now! TAXI!"

**Well, now, our Christian Grey admits that he loves Ana. Beware of more drama for the future and it doesn't include Elena. As you can see, she moved on and she just wants the best for Christian to make up her mistakes. So, I am currently watching 'Love and Other Drugs' as I am patiently waiting for your reviews. Ahahahahaha. ! LOL. Thank you, thank you Guys!**


	12. Chapter 12: Turning Page

**Hello Guys! I wouldn't be able to update that fast after this so I really hope that you are going to be patient with it. Thanks to MrsCTGrey, JolieBlanc, peetame, hersar1997, shan36, christian618, guest, JpearlQT, shanay palmer, kaycad742, APEJEN, pookiebear3, ISana55, meggan-sa, Pielietje and Amez711 for the reviews. :* Anyways, let's start it!**

**CHAPTER 12: TURNING PAGE**

**APOV**

Where is Christian? The contest started about two minutes ago and we are going to be the forth performer. Kate was holding my hand, silently comforting me. I know that she feels bad right now. If Christian doesn't show up, I would never ever forgive him. His family is here. Carrick cancelled all his meetings just to be here and Grace also. I hope he finds a better excuse of not showing up.

"I don't think he will come." Elliott spoke. I just shrugged at him. The first contestant was finished singing that Barbara Streisand song. The host announced, "Let's all welcome contestant number 2, Fay Mary Barrington!" The blonde haired woman sang on the stage and it is making me nervous. There is no way in hell I am going to win this whole thing.

"If Christian would not show up, he won't be the maid of honour in my wedding." Kate told me and Carrick and Grace just stared at her with full understanding. Mia and Ethan had that worried look. I know that if he won't show up, Ethan would be madder than me. He's been really protective of me ever since my family died. He is like the brother I never had.

"Where the hell is that asshole?" Mia asked herself and Ethan answered, "I just hope he is on his way. There is no way I won't punch him if he doesn't show his ass here." See what I mean? Ethan's really like this and sometimes it strangles me but I can handle it.

"And that was Contestant Number Two!" We applauded and my nervousness was added when Contest Number Three sang. Okay, this guy is a great opera singer. He's like better than Hugh Jackman and Russell Crowe combined. I just embarrassed myself! Oh my God! This is the worst day of my existence. Where is that Christian Grey? Where the hell is my pianist?!

Then, to my surprise, Grace yelled, "Christian? You came!" We all turned our heads and looked at the direction of where he was. My eyes saw red as I saw him . . . with that woman! I immediately ran to him and slapped his chest multiple times. "So, you are late just because you reconciled with that bitch?!" Christian looked hurt at what I said.

"Ana, I would never do that. You know me better than everybody else!" He explained things to me. He cupped my cheeks and I threw his hands away. I am extremely mad and hurt and no touch of his can calm me down.

"Maybe it's best if I leave."That Demi Moore Cougar Mrs. Robinson suggested and I laughed bitterly at her. "Hahahahaha! Fuck you, Bitch! Leave now, okay?" She pursed her lips and slowly nodded. She went out afterwards. Christian stared at me with that remorseful look and I still managed to shout at him. "Leave Christian, Leave!"

Then, the host said, "The next contestant is Miss Anastasia Rose Steele with her pianist, Christian Grey!" I just stared at everybody with my heart racing. "Do you still want me to leave?" Christian teased and I just glared at him. I am still mad at him. I slowly went upstage and he followed right behind me. I stared at everybody and my eyes paused at Christian's family's table. Tears sprung from my eyes as Christian started to play the piano. I cleared my throat and closed my eyes. I just thought to myself that my family is watching here.

**I must be crazy now****  
****Maybe I dream too much****  
****But when I think of you****  
****I long to feel your touch******

**To whisper in your ear****  
****Words that are old as time****  
****Words only you would hear****  
****If only you were mine******

**I wish I could go back to the very first day I saw you****  
****Should've made my move when you looked in my eyes****  
****'Cause by now I know that you'd feel the way that I do****  
****And I'd whisper these words as you'd lie here by my side******

**I love you, please say****  
****You love me too, these three words****  
****They could change our lives forever****  
****And I promise you that we will always be together****  
****Till the end of time**

I continued to sing the song while imagining my family's face in favour of me starting a new life with Christian. I am still mad at him though but I need to give this performance my all. This is for Christian and also for . . . them. The song finished with everyone clapping their hands awkwardly. I know they don't like it. Fuck! I just embarrassed myself!

I ran down and tears are freely streaming down my face. "Ana!" I heard Kate ran behind me. "Just leave me alone." I told her and when my hand was holding the doorknob, I heard Christian over the microphone, "Ana, I know you are so mad at me right now but please, please just listen to me."

I looked at him and I am not sure if I am hearing it right. He was meters away from me but I can sense the sincerity in his pleading eyes. "Excuse me, Sir, Contestant Number five is waiting now." With that, the crowd growled at him. They screaming, "screw it!", "let the guy speak!" I laughed at that. The host was pretty much apologetic so he went out of the stage.

Christian cleared his throat and said, "I am going to sing this song for you, Ana. Every line is dedicated to you." He started playing the piano and I listened attentively . . . with my heart.

**I've waited a hundred years,****  
But I'd wait a million more for you.****  
Nothing prepared me for,****  
What the privilege of being yours would do.**

**If I had only felt the warmth within your touch.****  
If I had only seen how you smile when you blush.****  
Or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough**.  
**Oh I would've known what I was living for all along.****  
What I've been living for.**

**Your love is my turning page,****  
Where only the sweetest words remain.****  
Every kiss is a cursive line.****  
Every touch is a redefining phrase.****  
I surrender who I've been for who you are,****  
Nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart.****  
If I had only felt how it feels to be yours****  
Oh I would've known what I've been living for, all along****  
What I've been living for.**

**Though we're tethered to the story we must tell,****  
When I saw you, well I knew we'd tell it well.****  
With a whisper, we will tame the vicious seas,****  
Like a feather, bringing kingdoms to their knees.**

Christian stopped singing and before I knew it, my smile is pretty big. He spoke, "Ana, I love you so much. I am really sorry I only admitted it now but it's better late than never, right? You're what I am living for, Ana." I laughed at that and I found myself running towards him and he was doing the same thing too.

I pressed my lips to his and he opened it. Our tongues are tangled up and I held him tighter. His hands were on my waist and I can feel his passion as he holds me tight. I pulled away, grasping for air. Everyone clapped their hands at us and I laughed along with Christian. Our foreheads are pressed together when I asked, "So, are we still friends?"

He smiled and answered, "Definitely not"

**There you have it guys . . . story's over. . . . JOKE. Ahahaha. I am not even halfway done. LOL. Will you get mad at me if I ended this story now? Ahaha. *clears throat* My favourite line would be, "nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart." Tell me what you think, Guys! Thanks!**


	13. Chapter 13: Master of the Universe

**Good evening Guys! I am officially finished with all my projects and there's only one problem. My finals are this week already. Anyways, I would like to thank Guest, Amez711, debs2000, christian618, shanay palmer, Sanders22, ISana55, JPearlQT, shan36, pookiebear3, Gaums30, kaycad742, som04, deltabelle, APEJEN and Pielietje for those amazing reviews. We shall start now.**

**CHAPTER 13: MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE**

**APOV**

I woke up feeling light kisses on my back. I smiled at that as I remembered what happened last night. He told me he loves me and he took me to a room in the hotel. We did it not once, not twice, not thrice but four times. I never knew that he was like that in bed. He was really rough and hard. I like it though. I love that side of him.

"Good Morning, my beautiful girlfriend" He whispered in my ear. I turned to face him. I gave him a soft kiss and said, "Good Morning to you too". He smiled at me and paved the way for me to lie above him. Our chests are against each other and there is no other more intimate feeling than that.

"I love you" I suddenly said. Then, he replied, "Not the way I love you." I laughed out loud and he raised his right brow in confusion. "What are you laughing about?" I answered, "Well, we sound so corny."

"You get corny when you're in love." He stated and I nodded. Silence invaded time for awhile but it didn't feel awkward. It felt comforting actually. Even though he doesn't say anything, I feel his love for me because I can feel his heart racing through his chest. I am sure my heart felt like that also.

I decided to break the silence, "For a moment, I thought you are getting back with that woman." He frowned instantaneously. I heard him say and as I predicted, he said, "Do we have to really talk about that? We are happy now. You have me. I have you. We have each other. There is no point of talking about that topic."

"I just want to know." I tried to convince him.

"No." He said firmly.

I frowned at him and pleaded, "Come on, please just tell me. I really want to know what happened." His face got frustrated and he still said, "No" Okay? . . . This isn't like Christian. Maybe this will work. I pouted my lip at him and I did the puppy dog eyes. He looked at me with that rough expression but I did not give up on my cute face.

My spirit was doing somersaults when he finally sighed and answered, "Well, I talked to her and she convinced me to come to the hotel. End of the story." His fingers traced my back when he said that.

"I am glad she convinced you." I told him. Who would have thought that I would sincerely be grateful of that Cougar? I never really thought that he would convince Christian to come back to me. He mumbled, "I really don't want to miss a once in a lifetime opportunity." I just smiled at him and rested my head on his chest. We just held each other at that moment and what caused it to interrupt is my grumbling stomach.

"Shit. What a moment breaker." I told myself and he pulled me off of him. I looked at him with mad eyes. "I just want to relax and stay like this for awhile. After all, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity." I repeated his words before. Nevertheless, he still pulled me off him and said, "Ana, what's more important is your system gets something to digest."

He stood up and wore his boxers. I stared at him strangely. When he was fully clothed, he bends his body and leans forward for a fierce, passionate kiss. I got really in to the kiss so I unbuttoned the first of his shirt. He quickly pulled away from me and said, "Eat first then sex" I groaned frustrated and stood up to wear clothes of my own. I went inside the bathroom to fix myself. My lips were pretty swollen and I feel very sore. I washed my face and tied my hair up for a ponytail. I went out of the bathroom and entered the dining area.

What the fuck? Why are there so many foods on the table? It looks as if there's a festival going on. I am only eating lunch and what? I am going to intake all of these? Christian was already sitting as he spoke, "let's eat, Babe." I nodded and sat across him. I stared at my plate with a wide eyed gaze. "I cannot take all of these, Christian." I told him.

"Ana, you need to. You really lost weight after days of not seeing you. I want you to gain meat and fill your stomach." Well, that was true. I was fucking depressed when he told me that we were only friends. I really don't want to be just that. I know that we can be something so why not do it?

"Christian, come on, I cannot intake all of these." I argued. He frowned and said, "Eat, Ana. There are millions of people in this world who cannot afford to buy one meal. You are fortunate enough. Please eat." With what he said, I just ate the food. I now understand what this is all about. It is about him being hungry when he was just a child. I pretty much understand that. I'd always try to understand Christian even though it's difficult. I just ate and ate.

"The food's nice" He expressed.

"Since when did you become so controlling?" I asked him and he lifted his face up and I saw his eyes brighten a little. "Why is your face like that?" I added a question.

He smiled and answered, "Well, I find that as a great compliment. It means I finally found my old self. I am back. The Master of the Universe is back."

**It's really getting late so tat ah! Good night guys! See you in my dreams! Btw, I would update Final Lullaby anytime this week. Just wait please! Finals are coming. Guys, please review. Tell me what you think. Thanks for reading!**


	14. Chapter 14: Seattle

**Good Morning Readers! I am so glad I can update today. Christian's back to being the master of the universe and I am happy of that. I am also happy of your reviews. Shanay palmer, tjett523, Pielietje, shan36, JPearlQT, kaycad742, Amez711, som04, Christian618, APEJEN, ISanna55 and pookiebear3. Thanks for reviewing last chapter! :))**

**CHAPTER 14: SEATTLE**

**APOV**

It had been a week since me and Christian got together. Well, it was full of love and loads of sex but I cannot complain at that. Christian's really good at what he does. A lot can happen in one week. Ethan and Mia got together, Elliott and Kate are getting busier for the wedding and Taylor is driving us now somewhere.

Christian and I sat at the backseat with his arm wrapped around my shoulder. I stare out the window and he was staring at me. I looked at him and met his meaningful gaze. "Where are we going, Christian?" I asked him and he just smiled. He doesn't want to tell me.

I got really confused why he was wearing a formal suit. Look at me; I just wore this brown coat with my black dress below. "I look like a maid when I am right next to you." I told him and he frowned. "Never say that, Ana. You are very beautiful and I am so lucky to have you."

"It's the other way around, I believe." I disagreed and he grimaced.

"I love you" He just said out of the blue.

"As much as I love you" I replied and kissed him on his lips. The kiss turned out to be so passionate. I wrapped my arms around him and he cupped my cheeks. Our lips moved in sync. Then, I feel his tongue licking my lips, wanting to enter my mouth. I opened it and our tongues moved together. He brushed his fingers through my hair and our hot make out session was interrupted by Taylor's clearing throat.

Me and Christian looked at him with an obviously annoyed expression. Taylor looked apologetic as he said, "We are here" With that, Christian fixed his outfit and I brushed my hair and wiped my lips. Kissing Christian Grey was really amazing and I can wait to do that again when we go home.

Christian went out of the car and opened up the door for me. I went outside and saw a big building with the name, "Grey Enterprises Holding, Inc.". My mouth dropped to form an 'O'. Who would've thought that a young man can own a business as great as this? "Welcome to my office, Ana." He told me as we entered.

It was huge and white and lots of blonde employees. Many people in black uniform I saw. Men walking in and out of the elevator and computers and lounge and wow! I looked at Christian and he smiled proudly.

"You finally got this back?" I asked him, amazed.

"Yes, he trusts me now." I smiled at that. We walked to the elevator with lots of employees saying, "Welcome back, Sir" He smiled at each of them and at this moment, I got a glimpse of his life. His life is very glamorous because he has lots of money and he owns a lot of extravagant things. I begin to wonder how come I made this man fall for me. Maybe, it's just fate. Maybe we're just made for each other.

As we entered the elevator, our hands held until it landed at the top floor. "Welcome back, Mr. Grey" A blonde girl greeted him and he smiled, "Thank you, Andrea. This is my girlfriend, Anastasia Steele. Ana, this is my PA, Andrea." I smiled at Andrea and she did too. She seems to be a nice woman.

Christian led me inside the door and my mouth just dropped. The office was wide and there's a black leathered couch. The view outside the glass windows was phenomenal. You could see every single place in Seattle right here. "Wow! Christian, this is so . . . beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you are" He said before pressing his lips to mine. I opened my eyes to see if Taylor is around. Well, he isn't. He must have been outside. I closed my eyes and felt Christian's kiss. I wrapped my arms around his neck. Our kiss deepened in each passing second. We pulled away to gasp for air and he said to me, "I have a lot of plans for us. We're going to go gliding and you would meet Charlie Tango."

My brows raised in confusion at that, "Who's Charlie Tango?"

"It's a surprise. Well, uhmmm . . . let's go to Escala?"

**I know it is short, Guys but I would like to apologize for that. My temperature no is 39 degrees so I am not feeling well to write a one thousand plus words chapter. I apologize. Thanks!**


	15. Chapter 15: Danger in Escala

**I am officially getting well now, Guys. I can finally go back to this story! Thanks a lot for your prayers and thank God also for making me feel better. Shan36, hersar1997, Christian618, Guest, shanay palmer, APEJEN, ISana55, som04, pookiebear3 and Pieletje, thanks for the uplifting reviews! IT enhanced my confidence! **

**CHAPTER 15: DANGER IN ESCALA**

**APOV**

Escala is the place where Christian previously lived and he's going back again to that place. I find myself back in the car with him and Taylor driving. To be honest, I am quite intimidated by his wealth. Of course I knew that he is rich but I did not expect it to be this much.

"We're a few minutes away to Escala and you didn't utter one single word." Christian mentioned and I turned my head to his direction and our gazes meet.

"It's nothing, Christian." I denied.

"Well, your eyes don't tell me that it's nothing." He contradicted.

Finally giving in, I took a deep breath and told him truthfully, "Christian, I am intimidated by your money. I am not used to this, you know. I mean, what if people will think that I am with you just for the money?" His reaction was something I never expected. I expected him to be mad at me and I was pretty sure I was ready to face his furrowing eyebrows but instead, he slowly smiled at me. "Christian, why are you smiling?"

His hand touched my right cheek and I leaned in. "Miss Steele, you are phenomenal." He stated.

"Phenomenal? How?" I was dumbfounded. How come what I said made me sound like a phenomenal woman?

"Well, I always knew that you aren't after my money. Hell, you are even intimidated by it." He said to me and I found myself smiling back. Christian's brain really works differently.

"I love you and not your money" I said.

"I love you, too, Baby." He said before he leans his face to mine. When we almost kissed, Taylor cleared his throat and I almost wanted to kill him for being such a disturbance. Christian and I went back to our best behaviour and went outside the car. I was greeted by this elite building and I feel myself being burned by intimidation again. Christian must've noticed it because he wrapped his arm around me.

"Welcome to Escala" He whispered in my ear and I giggled at that. We entered the building and proceeded to the elevator. It was really quiet until Christian's phone rang. He groaned before he answered. "Grey" He snapped. I swear I've never seen him act so formal like this before. This Christian was very different from the Christian I met who wasn't nice when we first saw each other and hates how fucked up his life is. This Christian with me now is indeed the master of the universe.

"Yes? Aha . . . Yeah? . . . I am here at Escala . . . He's outside? . . . What is he doing there? . . . Come on, Andrea! Why is that stockholder outside my home? . . . Okay, a goodbye before he heads back to Milwaukee? . . . Okay, tell him I'll be there." The call ended the same time the elevator door opened. Christian sighed and spoke, "Gail's having her day off so I'll send Taylor with you inside. A stockholder of my company is downstairs to say something."

"Who is Gail?" I asked him.

"She's my housekeeper" He answered and I nodded, saying, "I will be fine here. Taylor must go with you. After all, you should be the one who must be protected."

He took a deep breath and said, "I see your point but you sure about that?"

"Yes, I am sure." I told him. I am not the one who owns a business with blonde employees and who happens to be a multi-billionaire. He and Taylor shared a glance and he pressed his lips to my forehead before going back to the elevator with his bodyguard.

I opened the door and flickered the lights on and wow! The sight was beautiful. There are different art photos everywhere and the furniture is very classy. Gail should have recognition for this. This place is spotless clean. I took off my brown coat and placed it on the foyer. I roamed around his house and smiled each time I see furniture I haven't seen before in my whole life. Who would've thought that someone like me could get a chance to visit a place like this?

I entered the kitchen and it's so clean. The kitchen materials are complete. My gosh! I wish my kitchen was like this also. I lack frying pans and other stuff. That's why my son can't eat what he asked me too. I froze at that and shook my head. Didn't I just stop myself to think about _them_? My heart clenched every time I think of their faces. I folded my arms and went back to the living room. What . . . the . . . fuck!

I was never scared like this before in my whole life. I was frozen in the spot of this room. God, save me now! It's a _girl_. She has brown hair; almost looking like me. And she has a lot of wounds. She has a gun, for Christ's sake! She looked as if she hadn't taken a bath for a long time. I was shivering and chills are sending down my spines. The familiar feeling of fear consumes my heart. Who is this woman and why is she pointing a gun at me?

"Who are you?" I tried to sound brave but I am sure I failed.

"Why does Master love you and not me?" She asked me back. She was sobbing while she did that.

"Master?" Then, I finally got it. She was an ex-Sub of Christian. I shook my head. I can't believe of what's just happening. I never thought I would meet someone from Christian's dark past. Did Christian turn her into something like this?

"Tabloids say that he is so in love with you. Master wasn't like this when he was with Elena. I stalked him all the time." I raised my brow at that and I hugged myself even tighter. Was she stalking us the entire time? "I see him smile when he was with you. He was even playing the piano. I never heard him play the piano before." Holy shit! She was watching us when we rehearsed?!

"Look, please, I am sorry for what Christian did but please, don't kill me." I begged, hoping she'd find that warmth within her heart.

"Master likes brunettes. That's why he is with you. We look the same but the differences are I am prettier and he loves you." She spoke and I just stared at her. Christian, what the hell have you done?

"Look, whoever you are, please stop this now." I told her.

"My name is Leila" She stated and I know I will never forget that name ever. The name, Leila will serve to be a remembrance of me almost killed. In case I won't make this, I'll carry this name with me to my grace.

Then, the door opened and Christian and I stared at each other with worry in our faces. Leila turned around and gasped in surprise. She dropped the gun and walked forward to him. When she reached him, she knelt in front of him and begged, "Master, Master, please take me back. I swear I'd be a better Sub." I stared at Christian with a horrified expression and he mirrored my emotion also. He stared at Leila with such sympathy and horror. He cleared his throat and called for Taylor, "TAYLOR?!" He arrived half a second later.

"What is it, Sir? Oh God!" He exclaimed as he saw Leila who is now sobbing on the ground.

"Get the gun and bring Ana outside immediately!" Taylor followed his orders as he picked up Leila's gun from the ground and grabbed me. He pulled me so fast from the house and led me to the elevator.

"Thank goodness, you are okay, Ana!"

"My coat! My coat! I left my coat!" I screamed literally at him.

"Shhh... Ana . . . Shhh . . ." He tried to calm me down but I can't. "My coat! I need it! My son gave it to me!"

**Well Guys, this is far longer than the previous chapter. There are going to be a lot of shocking revelations in this story and I hope you're going to stay with me until this story ends. Thanks Guys for reading. **


	16. Chapter 16: The Coat

**Hello Guys, I want to thank you for the reviews you gave. Guest, kaycad742, roadrunner3x, shan36, jms-83, Guest, APEJEN, Pielietje, Guest, and som04, thanks a lot! I have a question . . . should I continue Final Lullaby? **

**CHAPTER 16: THE COAT**

**APOV**

It's been thirty whole fucking minutes since me and Taylor are waiting here outside of Escala. What in the hell is keeping them long or is Christian even safe? This day has been like a roller coaster. We've been in Christian's office the whole day and I was happy. This night, a psychopathic woman tried to kill me and I am not sure if Christian will be safe too.

"Why do you keep on fidgeting, Ana? Christian can handle Leila. He will be safe. As for your coat, we can get it after he is done taming her." I nodded at Taylor. I have been in so much agony for the past minutes. Gosh! I've never been like this before.

"Where will Leila go after this?" I asked him.

"I recommend she should go to rehab." I nodded at that. Leila should be put into a place where she can get over Christian and stop being angry at me. I tried to calm myself down. How can you even relax when the man you love is alone with a psycho inside his house . . . and your most treasured coat is there? I put my hands on my face and drifted off to a memory.

"_Happy Birthday, Mommy!" My little JJ greeted me and handed a red box with a green ribbon. My eyes went wide at that. JJ never gave me gifts. I smiled at him and kissed his forehead. "You didn't need to do this" _

"_I want to, Mama. I love you." He replied and I caressed his face. Jose was watching us with pure adoration. He said, "Well, our son here wanted to give you a present so I gave him money. We went to the mall and he bought something." I smiled at what he said._

"_Open it, Mom" He requested and I gladly did. I tore the gift wrapper apart and opened the box inside. It was a brown coat. It looked old and big but I still love it. I hugged JJ tight and I heard him whisper, "Do you like it, Mommy? I picked it up for you." _

"_Of course, I love it, Sweetie. Thank you!" I kissed his cheek and he kissed mine too. _

_He added, "Mom? Promise me you'll always wear that? I don't want Baby to feel cold in there." He said as he ran his little hand along my stomach. Me and Jose laughed and I heard my husband tell him, "Baby won't get cold."_

"Ana? Ana? Earth to Ana? Hello?" I suddenly conquered back my senses and Taylor was trying to get my attention. Was I reminiscing for a long time? There's an ambulance outside the building and police officers too. Oh my God! Is Christian okay? I ran across the street and went inside the building. I entered the elevator and went up with an agonized heart.

_Was Christian okay?_

_Did Leila shoot him? _

_Please, God, no . . ._

The elevator door opened and I opened the main entrance of Christian's place. I sighed in such huge relief when I found him standing in the middle of the room. He was safe but still, he had that guilty looking expression. I ran towards him and hugged him tight.

"What happened?" I asked.

"She's fine now. I just sent her to rehab." He answered.

"I mean, what really happened?"

He took a deep breath then replied quietly; "I gave her a bath" I was taken back at that. I pulled away from his embrace and my shocked face met his sorrowful ones. I shook my head at this. He gave Leila a bath? "Did something happen with you two?" I asked straightforwardly.

His eyes shot wide and he almost yelled, "Do you think I will cheat on you?! God, Ana! You must know me better than that! It was like bathing a broken child!" I wasn't still convinced of what he said. I just stood there and looked at him with complete disappointment. I really don't know what to believe in right now so I just decided to turn around and find a motel.

"Ana, where are you going?" He sounded alarmed and fearful.

"I need space. I need time to calm myself down." I answered him at the same time proceeded to the foyer. I froze. Where is my coat?! I turned to Christian and asked, "Where is my coat?"

He answered, "I let Leila borrow it. She needed decent clothing. Ana, please stay!" That's it! My eyes saw red and I grabbed a huge wave of strength and slapped his cheek. He stared at me, shocked of what I did. I took a step back as he tried to reach for me. I found myself sobbing. He leaned to wrap his arms around me but I hit his chest many times.

"How can you do that to me, Christian, huh?! How? That was my coat! Did I give you the permission to let her borrow it?!, huh?" I sobbed and I just know he lost it.

"Why are you doing this just for a coat, Ana? Why?! Do you really want us to have a huge fight about a coat that seems to be old and rugged?!" I stoned at what he said. I shook my head and more tears came.

"Christian, that coat was given to me by my son who died after a severe injury. His father, my first love, gave him money and he was the one who chose that coat. He chose that coat because he didn't want his little sister in my womb to get cold. That coat was the symbol of my family, Christian! You just gave it away and called it old and rugged. How heartless can you be?" I spat and he wore a guilty expression. He looked so apologetic but I turned my back and walked out of his home.

Tears poured down my cheeks as I wrapped my arms around myself. It's cold outside and I can't feel warmth. I can't feel protection. I feel exposed to danger and I feel as if I am going to die of hypothermia.

And there, I walk along the street with no one to make me feel warmth and protection . . .

**What's your reaction of Christian letting Leila 'borrow' the coat? Was Ana right of slapping him? *sigh* this is a depressing chapter. It had a sad flashback. What do you think Guys? Thanks for reading!**


	17. Chapter 17: Revelation

**The coat was a really huge blast for everyone, eh? Well, this will be the biggest revelation in this story. Stay tuned. Thanks to Amez711, , Guest, emmanouella100, Pielietje, som04, APEJEN, kaycad742, ISana55, jms-83, Christian618, pookiebear3, MrsCTGrey, shan36, hersar1997, JPearlQT, kturner1187 for the reviews! Here we go . . .**

**CHAPTER 17: REVELATION**

**CPOV**

I am officially the greatest son of a bitch of all times. Why the hell did I just do that? I didn't know that the coat was given by her son. I am a complete asshole, I am a huge asshole and I am a real bastard. I didn't even follow Ana outside. I let her sleep somewhere uncomfortable. If I'd just go after her, she'd push me away.

"Hey, Baby, please, please pick up the phone. Seriously, I am really losing my mind over here. Are you okay there? Did you take your meal? I am really sorry about the coat. I didn't know, I swear. I am going to get it in New York next week. I can't right now because I am in Elliott's Bachelor Party. I guess I'll just see you tomorrow and I promise, I will give back to you the coat. I love you so much." I left a voice mail. She hasn't been answering my calls for the past four days. I cannot go to her house because of my busy days in the company but I hired Sawyer to look for her and make sure she is safe.

I sighed at that. I hope my Ana is safe. I was the one who put her life in danger anyway. The thought of Leila almost killing Ana was vulnerable. It was the most painful thing that can happen to me ever. I tried to get the coat back but the hospital said that they already sent Leila to a rehabilitation center in New York. I shook my head at that. If I just knew how valuable that coat was for her, I wouldn't have given it.

"Hey, bro, it's my Bachelor Party! Come on! Enjoy!" My brother, Elliott approached me. I know he noticed how lonely and empty I am.

"I really can't enjoy, Elliott. Not when my girl is very mad at me. I just gave her precious coat to someone who almost attacked her! Can you believe how fucked up this is?!" I blurted out.

"Well, Bro, you better get that coat back." He advised.

"I will, okay? Now, what does it feel like to get married tomorrow?" I asked him, changing the topic.

"Well, it feels nerve wrecking and exciting at the same time; Nerve wrecking because I don't know if I will look good enough for her and exciting because I am going to spend the rest of my life with her. Oh, Christian, come on! You were supposed to be married once! You know how the feeling's like!" I laughed a little at Elliott. He got so much drunk on my Bachelor Party a year and half ago.

"Elliott, those memories were long gone. I think I never felt the way you do right this moment." I told him and he had that questioning look.

"Explain that" He ordered.

"Well, that time in my Bachelor Party I was very excited and confident but I don't know. I am just not that happy. I swear if it were Ana who is going to get married to me the next day, I probably wouldn't go to sleep just feeling the joy I have." I said with such awe and adoration.

"You love Ana" He stated.

"More that anyone will know" I added and Elliott nodded. He feels the same way for Kate, I can tell. Shortly, our conversation was cut when a friend of Elliott came with a drunken Ethan in his arms. "Hey Man, this blonde man is so drunk! Mind helping me?" I rolled my eyes at him and Elliott grabbed Ethan from the man and made him sit right next to me.

"Hey, Elliott, mind getting more drinks with me?" The guy asked my brother.

"Oh sure" Elliott replied to him before turning his head to me, "See you tomorrow, Christian. Don't get too drunk, maid of honor" With that, he walked away with his friend. I have no plans to get drunk tonight.

"How is Anastasia, huh? Grey?" Elliott asked me.

"We're in a fight" I answered curtly.

"Well, I am really wondering why she loves you. You're so arrogant and you hurt her many times now. You gave her coat, man? You're such a huge asshole!" His words slurred and I just rolled my eyes at him. He looks and sounds really pathetic.

"Why don't you just shut up, Ethan?" I suggested.

"Grey, as your future brother-in-law, I apologize for what I said." My jaw dropped at what he said. "You and Mia are getting married?!" What the hell? Mia's going to get married earlier than me?

"Yes, Grey. I proposed last night." He answered, still slurring his words.

"Well, you just got together for one month."

"It didn't matter okay. Now, I wanna know. Why are you treating Ana so bad, huh? She's been so quiet these days and she won't leave my apartment! Oh God, I could've sworn I can kill you right now. I am just so weak to do that." I am now trying to stay calm and try not getting into jail again. Ana's so depressed these days because of me being such a huge asshole.

"Why are you so protective of Ana, huh? Do you like her? Because if you do, I am going to tell Mia." I raised my voice a little at him.

"You want to know my secret? I was the reckless driver who killed her family." The world just stopped the moment he whispered those words.

_I was the reckless driver who killed her family_

_I was the reckless driver who killed her family_

_I was the reckless driver who killed her family_

Ethan repeated those words and he began to sob. Tears formed in his eyes and I almost wanted to sob too. I stood up and walked out of this bar. I went outside the terrace to breathe. That's the reason why he has been so protective of Ana ever since the accident? I thought of my poor, Ana. All this time, she didn't know that Ethan was the reckless driver? He made her look like a fool! He made her clueless! FUCK! What's happening to us right now? What?

I think there's a more important question than that . . . Should I tell Ana or not?

**What are your reactions about Ethan being the reckless driver? Should Christian tell Ana or not? Oh . . . where is this story going? Haha. I guess I am the only one who can answer that. Please leave your opinion. Thanks for reading.**


	18. Chapter 18: Wedding

**Wouldn't you just love the new font text of ? Wow... this is so new to the eyes. Anyways, I would like to thank Guest, Guest, Beth, Pielietje, som04, hermionesteele, APEJEN, kaycad742, 1DBG1, shanay palmer, Guest, meggan-sa, pookiebear3, ISana55, Guest, jms-83, JPearlQT, Amez711 and shan36 for the wonderful reviews! So . . . let's start!**

**CHAPTER 18: WEDDING**

**CPOV**

I came to the church and my eyes searched for Ethan Kavanagh. I decided to just force him to tell Ana the truth. I have put Ana in too much pain already and I am not adding anything again.

There were many people already in this church. I don't know some of them. I circled around the church and there I saw Elliott. He was wearing a tux and his smile is as big as ever. "Hey, Little Bro, I am getting married in just a few minutes!" He expressed and I replied, "That's why we're here."

"I am finally keeping Kate forever." He said and I just nodded. I was still on full attention on finding Ethan. My eyes popped open the moment I saw Ethan enter the church with Mia holding hands. "Excuse me, Bro" I said to Elliott before running my way towards them.

"Christian? Why are you such in a rush?" Mia asked me.

"Can you give me a moment with Ethan please?" I requested and she nodded with a confused expression. "See you soon, Babe." She kissed Ethan's lips before disappearing our sight.

Me and Ethan stared at each other long enough before he started the talk, "Christian, is this about last night? What I said is true, Bro. I am the reason why Ana lost her family."

"You should tell her, Ethan." I suggested firmly.

"Well, Christian, I don't think I can handle going to jail. I mean, Mia and I are getting married soon." He said it in a whisper. I shook my head and laughed bitterly at him.

"Seriously Ethan, you are making Ana look stupid. She has been trying to find out who was the reckless driver but it's been someone so close to her all along. Come on Ethan, stop this Man!" I talked things out to him because I am sick of seeing Ana believe that he has been an overprotective and worried friend when the truth is he was just comforting her for his conscience.

"Christian, please, Ana has moved on with you and she doesn't have to know." He argued with me and I rolled my eyes.

"She moved on from her husband, Ethan. How about her kids? There is no replacement to that." I told him. How could he just take for granted the fact that Ana loves her kids so much?

"Then make babies" He said and I circled my fist at that. How can he say something like that? How can he be so insensitive? "You must tell Ana" I told him with an obviously annoyed and horrified voice.

"Tell me what?" Our attention was completely caught by the velvet voice of Ana. I looked at her and she was wearing this floral couture and her hair was curled. She looked so beautiful and gorgeous. "Hello Christian? What should Ethan tell me?" She pressed.

"Uh . . . I . . . Uh. . ." Should I tell her now? Ethan would surely not tell her. I don't want Ana to think that she can't imply justice for her family. Tell her now? I am losing my mind over here!

"Tell you that me and Mia are getting married." He told Ana and she basically squealed. I rolled my eyes at that. Ethan, why are you doing this? Ana jumped at him and held him so tight. She asked questions to him and I just saw red. Little did Ana know that she was wrapping her arms around the murderer of her family.

"I am so happy for you and Mia." I heard Ana say.

"Thank you. Well, speaking of Mia, I need to go to her now. See you later, Ana!" He gave her a friendly hug before finding Mia. He didn't even look at me before he went.

I took a deep breath and shot words at Ana. "Baby, I am really sorry. I swear I didn't know anything about that coat. Ana, Baby, please, please don't get mad at me anymore. I am going to New York this weekend just to get the coat. Please, Baby, I love you. Forgive me?" I looked at her and she was looking down the ground.

She lifted up her head and I met her eyes. How I miss those eyes for so long. "Christian, I am also sorry for not speaking to you for four days. I mean, yeah, I just needed space from what you did." She apologized also and I shook my head. I wrap my arms around her and kissed her forehead, "I am the one who should apologize, Baby. Never ever say sorry to me." I told her and she slowly nodded.

"I love you" She said before pressing her lips to mine.

"I love you too" I told her when our lips parted.

"The bride has arrived. Bestman and Bridesmaid, please be ready!" We heard Kate's mother arrive and Ana and I laughed secretly at her. She is already in tears. Me and Ana went to the place where we should be. "Good luck, Elliott" I whispered to my brother who seems to be fidgeting.

Then, the walk on the aisle began . . .

**The day we met, Frozen, I held my breath.**

**Right from the start, I knew it I found a home for my heart beats fast**

**Colours and promises, how to be brave?**

**How can I love when I am afraid to fall?**

**Watching you stand alone, all of my doubts suddenly goes away somehow.**

The whole time Kate walked down the aisle, I can't help but to imagine that it was Ana who was walking for me. I lost myself with a vision I just saw in my head. I take off Ana's veil from her face just to kiss her lips. I can see us in a house with a lot of kids and Ana is the greatest mother I ever saw. If I can define Ana in one word, she means my future.

I looked at Ana who stands across me and she is smiling at Kate. Should I ask to marry her or should I just tell her first about Ethan? I really don't know what to do.

**I already used three songs for this story. The Way You Look Tonight, Turning Page and A Thousand Years. *sigh* So, Ethan won't tell Ana . . . this is going to set a huge confusion on Christian now that he has this eagerness to marry her. Please please comment! :)) Thanks for reading my work!**


	19. Chapter 19: Triumph

**It's been too long since I haven't updated. Thanks to pookiebear3, kaycad742, , shan36, som04, APEJEN, Christian618, Pielietje, and Amez711 for the reviews! Let's start.**

**CHAPTER 19: TRIUMPH**

**APOV**

I walked along the shore, feeling the cold breeze. If Christian just didn't hand Leila my coat, I would've felt warm now but I cannot see the point of being remorseful of what's done already. Even though Christian did that, I still manage to forgive him. Tell you what? I love that we are okay now. Hopefully he will just get the coat back and everything will be perfect.

Kate and Elliott decided to have their wedding reception in the beach. I enjoyed the party a lot but I just want to feel the wind. I remember getting married to Jose. It was in the backyard of our house; the backyard where we'll always play with JJ and the house where I live right now. That's the reason why I just can't leave my home.

_Flashback_

_I never thought we'd be getting married. All I know is that Jose and I were just bound to raise a baby together but overtime, he and I seemed to feel comfortable around each other and both of us just fell in love._

_Here we are, having a small ceremony in our backyard. JJ is being carried by Carla and tears were streaming down her face. I smiled at her as I walked down the mini aisle. I was so happy the moment Jose took my hand. _

_We faced each other and the priest was speaking words that we can't understand because all we care about is that we are facing each other with goofy expressions. Who would've thought that the man who accidentally impregnated me was my true love? Then, the preacher said that it's time for the vows._

_I was the one who started it, "Jose Rodriguez, I never thought that I would be so desperately in love with you. Who would've thought that we'd have a crazy love story? I love you so much; Jose and I promise to love you as long as I'll live. Without you Jose, I cannot imagine how my life would be. I love you very much, Jose. I am yours forever."_

_My eyes were wet and his were too. He spoke, "Ana, I love you so much. I love you even before we had JJ. When I found out you were pregnant, I wanted to beat myself. This isn't the future I planned for us. I planned for us to graduate and I will prove to you how much I love you and then we'll start our own family. But Ana, this life is just perfect. I know we had ups and downs but JJ and you are everything to me. I love you so much, Ana. I love every single thing about you. I promise to love you even though I am in God's kingdom."_

_END FLASHBACK_

_I promise to love you even though I am by God's kingdom. _His vows still haunt me after all this time. Yes, I still love him. As long as I'll live, right? However when I met Christian, something inside me just snapped. I thought I would never love someone as much as I loved Jose but it ended up of me loving him more than I ever loved Jose.

We were supposed to grow old together but a reckless driver changed our fate. I will kill that person once I find out who he is. I sighed. If my family didn't die, I wouldn't be with Christian right now. The situation's just all tangled up. They say everything happens for a reason. They died for me to be with Christian and I don't find that reason acceptable enough.

Then, I felt strong arms wrapped around me. I tilted my head and smiled at Christian. We just stood there in silence with the sound of waves and birds. We watched the stars and I stopped thinking of sad things. I will always keep a part of Jose with me and he'll always have a space in my heart as Christian has now.

"Lovely stars" Christian complimented.

"I agree" I spoke.

Then, I felt him release me and I turned around with a pout. I gasped at what he was doing. He was kneeling in front of me. The moonlight was over his face.

"Ana, I apologize for not having a ring but when I saw Kate walking down the aisle, all I can see is you. It was a moment of fast forward to the future, Ana. I saw us getting married and having a lot of kids. You are the one, Ana. You are the one. I love you so much. Please forgive me for not having a ring but marry me, please." He asked me and before I knew it, I was crying so loud.

"Yes" I managed to answer beyond my cry. He smiled and stood up. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me for a deep and passionate kiss.

**Christian618, I updated early for you. Thank you so much! Please review.**


	20. Chapter 20: The Breakdown

**Well, I just want to tell you something about me. I dream to be a lawyer and the next Nicholas Sparks. LOL! I am so ambitious. Thanks som04, , Pielietje, greyfan79, christian618, APEJEN, Amez711, hersar1997, mojojojo152, bou77, kzahn1990, kaycad742, pookiebear3 and shan36 for the last reviews. Let's start!**

**CHAPTER 20: THE BREAKDOWN**

_From: Christian Grey_

_To: Anastasia Steele_

_Subject: Missing You and Marriage_

_Baby, New York is freaking lonely. I am so sad right now. I wish I brought you here. The Big Apple would've given me a nice simple smile. Anyways, I am so excited about our wedding. What kind of wedding do you want? Church or Backyard? We can go have a civil marriage or just elope to Vegas. We'll get married in whatever you want, Baby. I love you so much._

_Christian Grey_

_CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc._

I smiled at that. Christian has been so excited about the wedding. Are we going to get married that soon? I just asked myself that. I know I am very ready to get settled down again even though there are some scars that cannot be healed. Christian has spent three days already in New York for a business trip so he gave me this Mac. I tried to give it back to him but yeah, you know how he is. He doesn't like being said what to do. What happened is that I just took this Mac in a good way.

_From: Anastasia Steele_

_To: Christian Grey_

_Subject: Missing You and Marriage_

_Christian, for the hundredth time, thank you for this Mac. I really appreciate this. Baby, just enjoy New York. You'll be back tomorrow; Baby and I can't wait to get laid again. By the way, enough of my sexual need, I just want the wedding to be simple except the backyard wedding and don't even ask why. I love you so much!_

_Anastasia Steele_

_Unemployed_

Me and Jose got married in our backyard and I want Christian and me to have a unique wedding. Sometimes I just feel bad for being with Christian and still not forgetting the past. Christian deserves better I guess but I deserve to be happy too, right? I know I will never move on from my lost kids but I can with Jose. What's the matter is that I vowed to love him as long as I'll live so that means Christian will have to share. Fuck! This is too confusing.

_From: Christian Grey_

_To: Anastasia Steele_

_Subject: Missing You and Marriage_

_Future Mrs. Grey, I just had jizz on my boxers. Well, we'll discuss that when I come back and I will feed your sexual need. X_

_Christian Grey_

_CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc._

I grinned like a chesire cat just because of what he said. That was a major turn on for me. He already had jizz in his pants and he's in New York? My inner goddess just went alive. I never thought I was that sexy and seductive. Oh shut up, Ana! Even though you are not that sexy and seductive, Christian will always think you are.

I shut down the Mac and at the same time, my phone rang. I checked my phone and I have one new message. Well, it's from Ethan.

**Need to talk to you. Meet me at my restaurant.**

Well, this is odd. It is six in the evening and he wants to talk to me? I just sighed. Being a good friend, I stood up and went to the foyer to grab the red coat I bought from a secondhand shop. This reminds me of the mistake Christian just did. I am still waiting for him to return that valuable coat to me. I turned off the lights before going out of my apartment. The restaurant is just meters away so yeah, I am just going to walk.

I kind of figured out what Ethan wants to talk about. Maybe he wants to have a double wedding with me. That would be exciting. I know how much Christian loves Mia and it would be great for him to be married at the same time she does too. I am happy for Ethan, really. He and Mia are so perfect for each other and I hope nothing will tear them apart.

I finally arrived inside the restaurant and I just smiled to myself. This is where I met Christian Grey. I remember him questioning my manners and now, he is marring me. That just proves that no matter how many plans you have in the future, fate will always offer something you never expected.

My eyes searched around the place and there was Ethan right at the center. He was sitting and my brows furrowed at his expression. Why does he look so down and depressed and scared and guilty? I wasted no time running towards him. I sat down across him and asked right away, "What's the matter? Did something bad happen with you and Mia? I hope to God, not."

He covered his face with his hands and shook his head, "No Ana, No"

I sighed with relief at that. "Then, what's the matter?"

He took away his hands from his face and just stared at me with that tormented expression, "I don't think you'd be able to forgive me after this"

I stared at him with a confused expression now. "What is it?" My voice sounded eager. What would make me hate him? He is the greatest comforter I ever had!

"Ana, I- UGH!"

"Tell me, Ethan! The suspense is killing me!" My voice raised a little at him. What could he possibly be telling me? I know everything about him already.

"I was the reckless driver who killed your family!" I gasped at that. He answered all too slowly that each word just stabbed me in the heart.

What?

Ethan?

Killer?

Reason why Jose died?

JJ died?

My younger baby died?

I began to breathe unevenly as I tried to absorb the words that were spoken in my mind. How? What? All this time I searched for the killer and he is right here?\ beside me? I began to breathe faster and faster, causing that killer to worry.

"Ana? Are you okay?" I looked at him and just slapped him so hard. He remained still and he wore that painful expression. I stood up and yelled, "How could you? How could you? How could you do this to me? Ethan, how could you do this?! You killed—you killed m-my f-f-family!" I screamed between sobs.

"I trusted you! I fucking trusted you! Ethan, how can you? H-how? How, Ethan?" I began to throw plates and utensils around and people just gasped at me. "AAAAAAA" I screamed as I was gripping my hair. I don't care if people think I am a woman with a mental disability right now. All I know is I was betrayed.

Then, all of a sudden, my heart rate got fast and I just can't breathe. "Ana?" I heard the devil call out my name before the color black just filled my vision.]

**Thank you Guys for reading! Please leave a review!**

**~AnnaJEssie(NicholasSparksWannaBE)**


	21. Chapter 21: Numb

**Hello everybody! I would like to thank you for the support I am receiving. Well, guys, I reveal that this will be the last five chapters of the story. Thanks to kaycad742, kturner1187,greyfan79, ISanna55, som04, Guest, Rauguste, Pielietje, samcarter1980, mojojojo512, APEJEN, shan36, hersar1997, Guest, pookiebear3 and Guest for the amazing reviews.**

**CHAPTER 21: NUMB**

**CPOV**

I smiled at the last e-mail I sent Ana. She has always been so sexually active and I am pleased to know that she misses my touch. I miss her too so much. New York City is so boring because there is no Ana to love. I smiled at the subject of our conversation. It's our marriage. I cannot wait to be her other half. I can see it all now. She's walking down the aisle and the song, 'Turning Page' is on the background.

Well, I just want Ana to be with me. In fact, I am going to surprise her with a house I just bought. It was really huge with a huge meadow. I chose that house because I want our kids to play in it. I smiled at the mention of kids. I really can't believe I would want to have kids again. Well, right now, it's with pure desire and honestly, I want a dozen. Like the twelve tribes of Israel, you know?

Then, my vision was interrupted by an annoying tune. Gah! It's my phone! I quickly answered, "Grey" I thought it was something that deals with my company especially when it is now in its clean slate with me coming back.

"Christian, you need to go home now! Ana just had a panic attack! She found out Ethan is the killer of her family! Oh my Gosh!" It was Mia! She was sobbing on the phone and I just stabbed breathing. He told her? He told her already? He told her when things are getting so great?!

_Christian, that is so selfish of you! You'd rather have Ana by your side, clueless that Ethan was the one who killed her reason for living?!_ I mentally scolded myself. I closed my eyes. What the fuck?! Ana is going to be so pained and Mia is going to have a broken heart! Fucking Ethan! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Quickly, with no hesitations, I stood up and got Taylor. I left a note for my client, hoping that he will understand. My fiancé is having a really tough situation right now and I will never leave her side. We went to the top of the hotel and got inside my private jet. I was breathing so fast, really, really fast. We felt triumph and now, everything is just tragic. I just sighed deeply, knowing that Seattle is too far.

Ana just had a panic attack and that means she is in the hospital right now. I don't want to see her with those needles. Please. I just can't bear seeing my fiancé in pain. Oh Gosh, I hope everything is going to be okay. If you'll just check reality, everything won't be okay. It's a serious matter we are talking about. We're talking about her family here and their killer who also happened to be her comforter. This just gets fucked up!

A few hours later of worrying what will happen in the future, we finally arrived in Seattle. Me and Taylor immediately proceeded to my black car. Taylor drove and I just shook my head in agony. I hate this so much, I really hate this. Why does it have to be like this? One minute both of you are so happy and then the next, everything's just ruined! That's what I hate the most about life.

Then, my fears just came back. Will I be left wifeless again? I shook those thoughts away from my head and somehow I just can't get it off of me.

What if Ana cannot overcome this problem? What if she'll just stick to the darkness? Please, no. Please! But if she will, I promise to stay with her. I vow to love her in hard times and good.

The car arrived in front of the hospital and I quickly rushed inside. "Anastasia Steele" I told the receptionist with a rushed voice. She said, "Forth floor, room D16." She answered and I just ran to the elevator. My sweat just came out and I felt very nervous. Finally, the elevator stopped in the forth floor and I searched for her room.

When I found it, all I saw was my Ana lying down the hospital bed, staring at nothing. She looked so pale and weak. Tears went from my eyes as I saw her in that form. She looked defeated and betrayed.

Mia was the one beside her. She was crying and crying and I don't know who to comfort. My sister or my fiancé?

I went near Ana and caressed her face. "Ana, Baby, I am here. I am here. Please stay with me, Ana. Please don't lose yourself. Please utter one single word." I caressed her face so tenderly but she remained still, looking at the ceiling. I hate seeing her like this.

"Ana, Baby please. I am here, Baby. It's Christian. I love you. I am here for you." I talked to her once again with more patience. Still, she remained so pale, so weak, so absentminded, so . . . numb.

That's when I decided to shake her body tenderly and I just sobbed, "Baby please, just say one single word."

Mia said, "Christian, she won't say a word. Ethan was the one who killed her family and I can understand her. She was trying to search for the suspect but all the while it was him. He was always there for her and now we know why. Then, you know what he did? He turned himself over the police and he's in jail right now. That means no wedding anymore." Tears flowed and yeah, everything here is just broken.

"I know that" I told her. Well, except for the part where he turned over himself to the policemen.

What surprised me is the fragile voice that spoke, "You knew?" I just looked at Ana with a horrified expression. For the first time ever, I don't know what to answer. This was worse than the time I hit her on the face. I didn't know what to say. I just stared at her with a horrified expression.

She turned to looking at nothing and one single tear came out from her eyes. That's it! I stood up and found myself outside her hospital room. I took my phone out and called my savior.

"This is John Flynn, how may I help you?"

"Doc, it's Christian. I really need your help."

**So that was one of the last five chapters of this story. Will Ana stay in the darkness or will walk towards the sun? Stay with me guys. This is almost over. Thanks for reading and please please review!**

**~AnnaJessie**


	22. Chapter 22: Dealing

**Here is the forth to the last chapter of the story. Thanks greyfan37, APEJEN, shan36, som04, ISanna55, kaycad742, Pielietje, jpinzer, , pookiebear3, mojojojo152, Guest, Guest and Guest for the amazing reviews!**

**APEJEN asked for a sequel . . . I am so, so sorry because I have no plans to do part two. Still, thank you so much!**

**CHAPTER 22: DEALING**

**CPOV**

"Tell me, Ana. What do you feel about everything that has happened now?" Dr. Flynn asked my broken Ana. We had been doing this therapy with him for a month now but she can't still seem to talk. That kills me every time. It hurts to know that she's suffering so much pain right now. If only I can just take her pain, I would.

One thing that scares me also is how our relationship is going to be. Since the day she found out that I already knew, she hadn't utter one single word to me. She'd only speak to me when it is necessary. I am not even sure if she's mad at me. She just seems so numb and depressed and . . . fuck! I hate seeing her like that. I am not even sure if we are still going to get married. I already knew that we will have to get married in a longer time but still, I wonder if we are still going to get married.

Going back to the therapy, my Ana answered, "Honestly, I feel really betrayed. Ethan knew how depressed I was. I mean he was there each time I cried for my family. He always visits me in my house just to make sure if I am eating and all the while, I thought he was doing that because he is my friend. I never expected he would do that out of guilt. I feel really, really betrayed." Tears were streaming down her face and all I can do is feeling guilty also. I know the fact that not telling her was actually betraying.

Dr. Flynn answered, "Now tell me, after your family died; what did Ethan do to make you feel better?" I looked at Ana to see how she responds. Her breathing hitched and she sighed after a few moments.

"He didn't really do anything. All he did was just forcing me to eat and he would watch me drink. Then, he'd listen to all my problems. He didn't really help. I got so much better when Christian was really there for me. I loved him since day one and all I know that he was the answer to my question." I got fluttered at what she said. Even though in times like these, she managed to make me feel loved.

"What question?" I asked.

"I'd always ask myself, 'what am I living for?' and you are the answer." She spoke and I saw Dr. Flynn smile a little. It's the first time in four weeks that Ana said something positive. I am happy I could be the reason why.

John cleared his throat and came back to his formal self, "Ana, I want to know. You told me three weeks ago that you got fired. Why were you fired? Did the depression affect your performance at work?"

Ana paused and I was worried when I saw fear in her eyes. Her eyes watered immediately and she breathed hesitantly. "Forgive me Christian but I need to say this"

My eyes grew in confusion with that one. I just nodded, not knowing what she's going to say. Is it something that is going to hurt me? Something that will make me leave her? Why did she have to apologize?

Ana took a deep breath before saying, "I got fired because I slept with every man in the office." I was dumbfounded . . . shocked . . . surprised at what she just said. What? She slept with everyone in her office? Seriously?

Dr. Flynn was shocked too but he managed to keep a mask which I had failed to do. "What factor made you do that? Speaking of everybody, how many were there?"

I braced myself for Ana's answer as she said, "Sixteen guys. I did it once with each of them. The reason I did that was because I miss my husband's touch. I mean, we were physically attached. I missed that feeling. I searched for that feeling in every man but I didn't." I can't deny I was hurt at what she just said. This is surreal pain.

"Forgive me for asking this but did you feel the touch of your husband in Christian?" Dr. Flynn asked her and I crossed my fingers as I waited for her answer.

"No, I didn't. With Christian, it was something I never felt before. It was a certain connection, a connection that cannot be easily broken." I sighed in relief at that. I am glad she's making love to me because she sees my face and not her husband's.

"Well, Ana, it seems that we are finished now. I have asked enough questions so why don't I see you next week for another session?" Ana just nodded at that as she stood up. Dr. Flynn spoke to me, "Thank you for your time" I nodded at him too. This has been the most emotional therapy I ever encountered and it's not even mine.

We went out of his office and Ana was walking fast. I just let her. Taylor will just be there, waiting in the car. I have been staying in her house for the last three weeks. She needed someone there and I'd be the one.

What surprised me is that when she didn't go inside the car but walked quickly in the other direction. I've grown alarmed at that. I ran after her, calling out, "Ana! Ana!" With every time I call out, she would just run faster.

"Ana!" I called out trying to catch her. I ran and ran. I tried so hard to not let her get away. "Ana!" That was my last call out before I finally stopped her from running away. We paused in front of the jewellery store and lots of people are passing by. Still, I held her body tight.

"Why are you running?" I asked.

"Don't you feel disgusted of me? Don't you?! Christian, I fucked different men! I know you feel disgusted!" She said in between her sobs.

"Ana, what are you talking about? I will never be disgusted of you. I love you!" Although the fact that she slept with sixteen guys is hard to take in, I will try because I am in love with her and she is my turning page.

"Christian . . . Christian, I can't marry you" My world just stopped at what she said. I already feel my eyes tearing up. "What?" I hated how I sounded like. I sounded like a real pussy.

"Ana, why? We can wait! Please, Ana. Please! Does this something to do about betrayal? Please Ana, forgive me. Ethan only told me that when he was drunk. Please Ana, please, please just marry me." I was practically begging her now and I see people staring at me but I didn't care.

"It doesn't have to do with that Christian! I don't want you to get tired of dealing with my shits!" She yelled.

"_I can deal with your shit as much as you dealt with mine_!" I remember her loving me even though I was an ex convict man who was left alone in the altar. What I was before was something hard to take in but she endured. There will be no reason why I cannot do what she did.

"I am sorry Christian but I can't marry you" She spoke to me before she ran off. I was shocked, staring at nothing. She . . . can't . . . marry . . . me . . . That's all what I am thinking of. I began to cry and my heart just broke.

This reminded me of the time I slapped her. I ran off because Elena showed up and Ana chased me. I hurt her then. And this? This is the other way around.

I got back to my senses when I heard people scream. What I saw hurt a lot more than I expected. . . It was Ana! She got hit by a van!

**Confession: The line, **"_**I can deal with your shit as much as you dealt with mine**_**!" was a sentence in my mind which elaborated into a Fifty Shades fanfic. **

**Now, will Ana be with her family in heaven or will she stay with her sun? Thanks for reading. Please review Please! Please! Three more chapters and we're done.**

**~AnnaJessie**


	23. Chapter 23: Towards The Sun

**So I got a review saying that this story is like written by a kid. How old do you think I am? Thank you greyfan79, hshtb5, Pielietje, shan36, Christian618, pookiebear3, rgmoonstar33, som04, hersar1997, APEJEN, , mojojojo152, ISanna55, Guest, Guest and Guest for the reviews! **

**Chapter 23: Towards The Sun**

**APOV**

I woke up and found myself in this beautiful meadow, surrounded by velvet flowers. I am confused. Where am I? I looked around and I am just in this meadow. This is an oddly unfamiliar place. I walked and walked to figure out where I am going and there was a river.

This is so weird . . . where am I really?

"Ana" I heard someone call me from behind. The voice . . . it really is familiar. I stopped breathing. I shook my head and closed my eyes, "This can't be, this can't be" I kept telling myself. No, no, it is not him. He was gone a long time ago and there is no chance that he is back. I just hugged myself and closed my eyes.

_Ana, please stop hallucinating._

Then, I was proven wrong when I felt the familiar warmth of his arms. I opened my arms and all I saw were arms covered by white long sleeves. My eyes went wide as I felt his head resting on my shoulder. Then he whispered in my ear, "Even though I am in God's kingdom" His breath felt warm and I finally decided to turn around.

"Jose?" My voice was barely whispered and my eyes were watering. He smiled at me having teary eyes also. "Jose! It's you!" I exclaimed as I jumped into him, hugging him tight. I wrapped my arms around him so tight and what felt right was that I feel his arms around me too and this time, it's real.

"I missed you" I said while tears were pouring down my face.

"We miss you, Ana" He told me and I raised my brow at confusion. Could it be—"Mommy!?" I heard a very cute voice and I looked at the direction of the voice. Tears streamed even more as I saw my son running towards me. "Mommy! Mommy!" He screams and I ran to him. I hugged him the moment I could reach him.

"I missed you. I love you so much! Mommy loves you so much!" I said in between times when I was kissing him all over his face. He giggles every time I did that. I smiled with tears at that. I've waited a long time to hear that sound again.

"I love you too, Mommy" He spoke as his thumb reached my face, taking away all the tears that disturbed him.

I was about to say something when I heard a cute girlie voice say, "Teddy! Teddy!" I was curious but the moment she finally appeared in my sight, my heart was beating fast. She had brown eyes and brown hair and she really looks exactly like Jose.

"You were pregnant, Ana and here she is. Here's Alexia." I looked at Jose as if he said something in a different language. I looked at Alexia who looks about two years old. She was smiling at me and she waved her hand, "Hi Mommy!"

"H-h-he-hello" I managed to say despite the shock.

"We were always watching you, Mommy and I like it when you were with Christian Grey. He's amazing. He loves you." She spoke and I just cried. I knelt down so we could be level in height. I hugged her and kissed her cheeks. Who would've thought I would meet the baby I lost? Here she is and she loves me so much.

"I love you too" I told her and she smiled. I stood up and she leaned into JJ. I looked at Jose and he was smiling at me as if I am the most precious thing in the world.

"This is heaven, Jose. I cannot believe I'll be staying with you forever." I spoke in a bittersweet way. I would be with them forever in this place but I want to go back to Christian as well. I thought of Christian and my face just went down. I cannot just leave him. I love him but I love my family too. This is such a difficult situation. Who will I choose to be with right now? Is the choice even mine to make?

"Ana, you won't be staying here." He told me and I furrowed my brows.

"You don't want me to?" I asked him.

"Of course, Ana I would want to but God has a greater plan for you in the future." He answered and I frowned.

"Does He even exist?" If he really did exist, why did he let me feel the most painful pain of all? Wasn't he even guilty for taking my family away?

Jose looked disappointed with me as he said, "Ana, you know He exists. You just didn't realize that He was always there."

I shook my head and spoke, "If He was there, why he took my family away from me? Why was Ethan the one who drove when he was drunk? Things are fucked up! He wasn't there. He never was!"

Right now, my husband looked frustrated, "Ana, I've already forgiven Ethan. JJ and Alexia did too. It wasn't his fault anyways. He got drunk. We understand what happened."

"How can you be that nice?" I asked sarcastically.

Jose ignored that and continued. "God was always there, Ana. God loves you so much. He loves you so much that He gave you Christian. He gave you a man who can love you more than I did. Even though there will always be a part of me that will ache whenever you're with him, I'd still feel happy for you. For so long, you've been living in the dark. Christian was your sun, Ana. God gave you him."

I cried at what he said, "I love Christian, Jose but there will always be part of me that will love you as long as I'll live."

Jose smiled at that, "That I am contented of. I love you too, Ana. Forever. Now, why don't you live life with clean slate? Start with accepting, forgiving and then you'll be happy."

I looked at him and nodded slowly. Jose cleared his throat and touched my back, "That's the way out here. Go to that direction." He was pointing at the sun and I raised my brow.

"Forgive and accept" He told me before he kissed my lips. We pulled away afterwards and I hugged both my kids so long and so tight. Even though they are not saying anything, I can sense that they are happy.

I carried on. I walked towards the sun but each passing time, I would just glance back at them. I was slowly walking. I don't want to lose seeing three of them. Then, Jose yelled, "We'll always be watching you, Ana! Now, go!" I quickly nodded and walked and walked towards the sun.

The sunrays! They are hurting my eyes. I just proceeded to walk and when I decided to open my eyes, the light was hurting but it faded within a second and all I saw was Christian's face in the place of the familiar hospital room.

**That's why it's called Towards The Sun. Please Review! Please! Please! Chapter 24 and then epilogue :)) That's all that's left.**


	24. Chapter 24: Forgiveness and Acceptance

**Well, this is the chapter before the epilogue. I would like to thank APEJEN, kturner1187, jpinzer, Christian618, greyfan79, som04, skyblue881, pookiebear3, bou77, mojojojo152, Pielietje, hersar1997, shan36, Gaums30, ISana55, Guest, Guest and tkc for the AMAZING reviews! I didn't expect you'd cry. **

**CHAPTER 24: FORGIVENESS & ACCEPTANCE**

**CPOV**

It had been six agonizing days since Ana's in ICU. I really didn't care if she wants to let go of me because what I really want right now is to see her eyes open. I kept crying for how many days now. This had been the most struggling month of life. It can't be ever compared to the days I had in prison.

"Wake up, Baby, wake up" I kept telling her for like a millionth time now. I'd kiss her hands from time to time and my parents would ask me to go to the cafeteria and take my meal. I just didn't want to leave this angel alone. I don't want to be gone when she wakes up.

I just stared right into her face, hoping she'd open her eyes now. Still, it didn't. I just sighed. When she wakes up now, everyone will be glorious and that includes Ray and Carla. I will never forget the day I first met them.

_Five Days Ago . . ._

"_Ana? Ana? I need to see my daughter!" I can hear a sobbing voice outside the hospital room. I immediately stood up and went out. I saw this woman who is really going hysterical and this man who seems to be so much upset but stays still and doesn't say a thing. I know who they are. I believe they are Carla and Ray._

_I went near them and asked, "Ma'am, Sir, are you Anastasia's parents?" _

_They looked confused at me and the man finally spoke, "Yes and who are you?"_

"_I am her fiancé." I answered and Carla smiled throughout the sobs. "You're Christian Grey?" I smiled at them. I am really glad Ana told them all about it. I still questioned myself if me and Ana are still going to get married. _

"_We are very delighted to meet you, Christian Grey but we really need to see our angel." He spoke and I nodded, leading them to the room. "ANA!" Carla screamed as she went near her daughter and hugged her tight. Ray wrapped his hand around Ana's. _

_They were like that for thirty minutes and all I had to do was watch. I feel really bad for them. Then, Carla stopped crying and walked towards me. She said, "Christian, thank you so much for everything you did. Ana had always been sorrowful after the loss she felt. You gave her a reason for breathing and I cannot thank you enough for that."_

_I cannot say anything. I was dumbfounded at what she said. I just smiled at her as she continued, "All that we need right now is to see her awake and we'll prepare for the wedding." _

Will there still be a wedding? I am so scared to know the answer to that but I just want her to wake up. I stared right into her face and gasped when her eyes were dramatically waking up. She looked as if there were lights blinding her. When her eyes are fully opened, I smiled so big.

"Ana! Ana! You're awake!" I practically screamed and carefully hugged her. She didn't say anything but hugged me in response. I felt her kiss my neck and in response, I kissed her lips tenderly. She kissed me back and I am happy. I pulled away from her and spoke, "Ana, I am going to get your parents. I met them five days ago and they are as eager as I am to see you wake up. They are very nice, Ana." She just smiled at me and I decided to stand up.

When I was about to, I felt her holding my wrist so tight. I looked at her and she was still smiling. She still hasn't said one single word but still, I am beyond happy right now. She pulled me and I know what she wants. I pressed my lips against hers and she forced my lips open. Our tongues collided as if we are trapped in a dessert with only one last drop of water left. I tilted my head for a better angle.

Since humans need oxygen, we pulled away from each other. I pressed my forehead against hers and I heard her breathe heavily. Unexpectedly, the first words she said to me was, "Marry me"

I gasped, shocked. She smirked and said, "Mr. Grey, will you marry me?" She asked and I giggled after a few moments of relief and gratitude to God.

"With pleasure, Miss Steele" I said to her before kissing her lips once more.

**APOV**

It had been a day since I was discharged from the hospital. Everyone seems so happy and perfect now. My mother and father are so happy for me. Carla and Grace were planning a big, big wedding. Elliott and Kate are having a baby. Christian? Christian was so happy. He even bought me this ring with a ruby gem. I smile every time I look at my fingers.

Well, two people are still unhappy and I am going to fix that. I walked inside the police station. Christian's lawyer already filed a note telling of Ethan's release. All I need to do was to get Ethan. "Hello Police Officer, I am Anastasia Steele and I am here to get Ethan Kavanagh." He smiled at me and stayed away from my sight for a few seconds.

I breathed every passing minute the Chief was gone. "Ana" I heard Ethan's voice and I looked at him. He looked really guilty and sad. He stared right into me with full despair and mix of gratitude.

"Ethan" I spoke.

"Miss Steele, you may leave with Mr. Kavanagh." The Police Chief spoke and I nodded. I walked out the station with Ethan as he spoke, "Ana, I am very, very sorry I killed your family. I never intended for it to happen. I am really sorry. I would also like to thank you for releasing me. Ana, you don't know how-" I cut him off by putting a finger on his lips. Jose and my kids already forgive him and to be honest, I also forgive him. He was drunk that night. He didn't have any intention to kill my family.

"Ethan, I wouldn't be releasing you if I still detest you. Now go find Mia and be with her." I put my finger down and he smiled at me sincerely. "Thank you so much" He spoke before calling a cab. I smiled as I saw the cab start its engine on. Everyone will be happy now.

I walked and walked and smiled. Forgiving someone feels like you are being freed from prison. You feel this light feeling in your heart and it just feels wonderful. I just walked home and unexpectedly, I saw my fiancé standing meters away from me. His hands were hidden in his back.

"Hey Love" I greeted as I was closer to him.

"Hey!" He spoke with excited eyes.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Well, I have a surprise for you." He spoke and I raised my brow. The thrill stopped when he revealed what he was hiding from behind. It was the coat. It was the brown coat my son gave and the same coat he gave Leila. I looked at it intensely.

Then, he said, "Well, I commanded one of my staffs to go to the rehabilitation center where Leila was. She was released and I heard she found someone now. She left the coat to a worker in the rehab, saying that someone might come and get this. Well, someone did. Here is the coat, Baby."

I just looked at it and closed my eyes. I took a deep breath and spoke, "Thank you for what you did but I won't need that anymore."

Sure, that coat was very valuable but it will just remind me of how I lost them. I have gotten to accept the fact that they are gone and won't be back. They want me to be happy and I will be happy. They will always be in my heart and I know they'll be watching me. They'll watch me being happy with my sun as what they wanted.

**So, we say goodbye to the coat! Thanks guys for reading! I hope you liked it. Thanks!**

**~AnnaJessie**


	25. Epilogue: Happiness

**Now we are here for the final chapter of Towards The Sun. Let me thank you guys for the last time in this story, kturner1187, APEJEN, Christian618, ISana55, Pielietje, som04, pookiebear3, kaycad742, shan36 and Guest! I love you all! Thanks for staying with me until the end.**

**APEJEN, I loooooooove youuuuu so much! :***

**EPILOGUE: HAPPINESS**

I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. Yes, I love my look. This one is fantastic. I went out of our room and proceeded downstairs. It had been four wonderful years since Christian and I got married. That thought makes me smile each time I think of it. My smile widened even more when I passed by the picture frames lining up on the table.

It was a photo of me and Christian. He wore this tux and I wore this lacy gown designed by Vera Wang. Yes, my wedding was really big. I tried everything to make them stop and keep it small but Mom would just hold me tight and whisper, "Sweetie, you've been through a lot. You deserve this."

I sighed, remembering our wedding.

"_You ready, Ana?" My father asked and I smiled at him. It was our time to walk down the aisle. Here we are, walking inside a French church. Can you believe it? Christian always knew how I love Paris. He made all guests come here in France and he paid for all of their fares. _

_Me and Dad walked behind men and women who are dressed in their golden outfits. I was the one who decided what the theme will be. The theme is 'golden sun'. It simply says how bright my life is now that Christian finally came. It will even get brighter once we are wedded._

_Tears went from my eyes the moment I saw my sun waiting down the altar._

That day was something I will never forget in my whole life. It changed me. That day changed me into someone more beautiful and confident and . . . _happy_.

Because my husband is a CEO, it means I can be one. He gave me this wonderful opportunity of having my own Publishing House and it made me glorious. It's called Grey Publishing Company and Anastasia Grey is the CEO. I couldn't be ever proud of myself.

The photo next to our wedding picture is my photo as the CEO. I was wearing this maroon formal suit and you couldn't even guess that I have been through a lot in my life. The next one is Christian's photo in his office. He looked sexier than ever and the last two photos? The last two photos make me cry every time. It was a solo photo of our son and our family picture.

_Four years ago . . ._

"_I can't do this, Christian, I can't, I can't." I pleaded. As much as I want to push him out, my vagina says no. The whole is so small. The head of the baby can't fit. Christian kissed my forehead before telling Dr. Greene, "Please do the caesarean section" Dr. Green nodded and I felt my hospital bed moving so fast._

"_Baby, everything will be alright." I am really surprised how Christian is so calm. I nodded at him. I didn't feel like this when I gave birth to JJ but this one is so different. This one is unique. This baby is half Christian and half me. _

_We entered this operating room and I felt Christian flinch when they gave me my anaesthesia. "Do you feel this?" I heard Dr. Greene ask._

"_Feel what?" I asked back._

"_She doesn't feel it. Let's go" Christian's hand and mine entwined each passing minute. Christian didn't dare to look. He just closed his eyes and I stared at him. He looked really nervous but somehow, I can feel he is excited._

_Then, our eyes faced the sound of the piercing cry. I teared up the moment I saw the baby come out. Christian lets go of me for the meantime and I heard him cut the cord. He came back a few seconds later, holding a small baby boy with his face covered in blood and white mush. _

"_Oh, Christian, he's so beautiful" I mumbled, touching his cheek. He fell asleep as if he didn't cry. Christian kissed my forehead and spoke, "Our Theodore is beautiful" With that; he kissed our son's forehead._

My reminiscing was interrupted when I heard a cute voice call, "Momma!" I smiled, turning around. I opened my arms for him and he jumped into me. "Baby Teddy, I love you so much" I whispered in his ear and he giggled saying, "I wuv you, Momma"

"Careful Teddy, Phoebe might be hurting there." Christian told him as he appeared in the view. Teddy let go of me and spoke to my tummy, "Sorry, little sis, you still kickin'?" I felt the baby kick inside of me. Three of us laughed at that. I am sure Phoebe can't wait to come out.

_Just wait Phoebe, only three months and you'll come out._

"Mommy needs to go to work now." I kissed both my boys' forehead but Christian wanted more. He pouted and I pressed my lips to his decently. We won't be doing the hard one in front of our son. "Be careful" He spoke, caressing my belly where I felt Phoebe somersaulting.

I waved goodbye at them and went out of the Big House. Sawyer was waiting for me in the car and when the engine was about to start on, I gazed happily at our house. We bought this house when we found out we're having a baby.

I mean, life is just perfect now and I don't want anything to change. I spent the entire time in the car, talking in my head.

_Jose, if you can hear me right now as you said you'll be watching me, I would like to thank you so much for everything you've given me. Thanks for making me realize that God has a greater plan for me in the future. No worries, Jose, I firmly believe that He exists now and I was such a bitch not to. He gave me Christian, he gave me Teddy and now, he is giving me Phoebe. He gave me you; he gave me JJ and Alexia. What was I thinking? Jose, thanks for making me walk towards the sun. Thanks for loving me and you'll always have a part of me that I will keep as long as I will live. Tell the kids I love them. I will always love them._

"Mrs. Grey?" I heard Sawyer interrupting my thoughts. I smiled at him and just went out of the car. I fixed my attire before walking to the entrance of the building. Upon walking, I notice a little piece of note flying by the air. Luckily, I caught it and it said, "_You're welcome_"

I looked around and faced each corner with a smile. I know he is here somewhere though I can't see him. He is happy for me. I just grinned and what I just did is enter the main door of this building I own and love each moment I will have with Christian.

**One thing I like about this story is that life will be fucked up. Yes, it will suck but in the end, everything is going to be well. Thank you all so much! I wish you the best!**

**~AnnaJessie**


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